The World According to Liane

Get the door... it's Dominoes.

2010-09-18T23:07:00.001-04:00

It's been awhile since I've been asked to cover the phones at work. I am not in a position that has to worry about that responsibility, but I have been in previous jobs.

I was the person who "got the paper stuck out of the copier" and "changed the toner" because nothing would print, and worried about who got what message. I was secretary, or clerk.... or administrative executive. It's all the same except for the pay. I was the person who had to plan my entire day around phone coverage.

That's why I love my current job. No secretary or clerical issues.... except for having to help cover the phones occasionally.

I've covered several times now, but there was never a call. Until a few months ago.

I agreed to "watch" the phones for a coworker while she "ran down the hall" and ended up talking to her the entire time until the phone rang.

I answered with the appropriate center name and the woman on the other end asked me a question that I had no clue how to answer. I told my coworker (who was still standing in my door) and she told me how to answer it.

After the call, I decided to write down the number to the answer (another FSU center) in case another call ever came in.

Fast forward several months and I'm cleaning my office. I come across the number to that center and decide that I really don't need it. So I toss it.

Fast forward to last week. I had to cover the phones again.... from 1 to 3pm. I didn't receive a single call until about 2:30. The woman wanted to know how to contact that VERY same center.

I stuttered for a bit then walked down to Gina's office (the main phone answerer) and sure enough found the number I needed.

Note to self: Never forget your roots.

I Write Like...

2010-07-17T07:23:00.000-04:00

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Checking in

2010-04-02T21:56:00.000-04:00

I can't believe it's been 3 months since my last post.

I just haven't had the desire to write anything lately. Well, many times I think of things I want to say, but I just never end up expressing it unverbally.

Writing is a chore to me. It comes naturally as long as I want it to, but I can't "just sit down and write". I just can't. I'm not that structured.

So I hope you will understand and keep checking back now and then. The urge will come back, I'm sure.

Multitasking 101

2009-12-31T16:09:00.000-05:00

Remember this picture of Jason multi-tasking?

Well now I have one of Jessica dong the same. She's using her iTouch (iPod) with cell phone leaning against her face while on the internet (either on Facebook or MySpace or chatting).

Dude... where's my car?

2009-10-27T21:54:00.000-04:00

Last Friday I was running late for work..... again.

Again, despite my futile attempts to the contrary. Drat my alien teenagers!

It was 7:45 am and I still had to stop by Publix. It couldn't be put off.

I pulled into a spot and hurried inside to get what I needed.

As I hurried back out, I noticed a man standing right where I had parked my car. My first thought was, "Okay, why is this guy standing right where I parked my car?" My second thought was, "Wait, WHERE is my car? I know I parked it there!"

I looked to the right and saw my car "parked" on the next row over. Parked against another car. Apparently had I left my baby in neutral and naturally it rolled downhill into another car.

I walked over to it wondering what to do. It was about 8:10 am and no one was around.

I went back inside Publix and headed to the first manger-type person I could find. I told him what happened.

Ryan immediately began helping. He went back out with me and told me to call the Sheriff's department to report the accident. He told me that Publix employees generally park in the same area of the parking lot (which coincidentally was NOT where my car ended up) so it may be a car belonging to one of the other businesses sharing the same complex. But as a precaution, he said he would do a page over the system.

Turns out that the car belonged to the cashier, Sheree, who had checked me out. IRONIC, YES??

So Ryan took over Sheree's duties so she could come outside with me to wait for the Sheriff to come and do a report. Believe me I was impressed... totally impressed. Publix is awesome on so many levels.

But isn't it funny how my life keeps messing with me?

A driving lesson

2009-10-03T21:36:00.000-04:00

Jessica just turned 15.

That means, of course, she is ready to learn how to drive... and boy is she ready.

She has been ready since she was two.

Of course, her wanting to drive immediately prompted Jason to ask to drive again. He hasn't driven since he got his restricted license eight months after his 15th birthday. He just hasn't had any interest.

So I took him out for a lesson yesterday. He started out great, remembering the clutch/gas feel from all those months ago, and we were off. We headed down my street toward the park. At the stop sign he had to either turn right or left. Straight meant running through a fence and into a tree.

He opted for left and proceeded into action. As he released the clutch, he floored the gas faster than he was turning the steering wheel and, as you can imagine, my heart stayed back at the stop sign.

SLOW DOWN!!!... STOP THE GAS!!!... BRAKE!!!

I can't remember what I yelled but I yelled and he made the turn just shy of totaling my car.

We continued down that road and, after getting an earful of advice, he turned left at the next road up. We travelled up that road with no problems until another car appeared. I could see panic sweeping over his face. To compensate for the approaching car, Jason began to inch the car toward the right side of the road. After a few "inches," however, I couldn't help notice how close we were to hitting mail boxes and such, so I told him to move over.

move over.... Jason, Move Over... MOVE OVER!!!

The car made it past us but the recycle bin on my right didn't.

I got out of the car and walked to the recycle bin. As I lifted it back up to a standing position thanking GOD no one saw the incident, I looked up to see a teenage girl staring at me from the porch and asking me if the can was okay.

I told her it wasn't dented, that it was okay, and explained that my son was a new driver.

She laughed and said, that's okay... "when my younger sister began driving she took out a mailbox on the street over," pointing to the street just behind her.

As I listened, I remembered an incident several years earlier when I lived on that 'street over' and had come home from work to find my mailbox in three million pieces. And I remembered the young girl who was so upset and was literally shoving money in my face to replace it and I said...

...that was me.

Ironic. Don't ya think?

Honestly, I can't think of anything

2009-09-29T19:12:00.000-04:00

Okay, I know I have been lax in blogging lately. For those who read me I apologize but I have to be in the mood ya know?

Here is an easy way out for me.... a quiz called the Honesty Meme.

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Beer.

2. Where was your profile picture taken?
On my couch at 1:30 am.

3. Can you play Guitar Hero?
No and I have no desire to.

4. Name someone who made you laugh today?
There are many, but the classic one for today was Amanda from work... she asked me if I got married while out in Colorado.

5. How late did you stay up last night and why?
I stayed up until 10 pm because I wasn't tired until then.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Well funny thing you asked.... Yes, I would move to the Colorado Springs area.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
I can't remember. I was too busy looking.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you on Facebook?
Other than family, I would say Rich.

9. Do you believe ex’s can be friends?
No. But having said that, I am friends with my ex.... or rather we are friendly which is good... but I do not believe a real friendship can continue with an ex because you need to separate lives in order to move forward.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper?
I thought it was Sgt. Pepper.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
A few weeks ago when I thought Dale and I were broken up.

12. Who took your profile picture?
Me.

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?
Dale wearing his awesome new coat (seriously, it's a chick magnet but don't tell him).

14. Was yesterday better than today?
No, but that's not to say that today is worse.

15. Can you live a day without TV?
Yes... but only a day!

16. Are you upset about anything?
Constantly.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Yes. But only if they are worth it.

18. Are you a bad influence?
Absolutely.

19. Night out or night in?
Usually in.

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
Toothbrush, makeup, hairspray, diet coke, Facebook (okay I know it's not an "item"), beer.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
Technically "hospital" it was Dale's brother Dusty. Untechnically, it was Dale's uncle Malcolm in hospice. (RIP to both.)

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
"Where are you?".... sent by my dear daughter who was waiting for me to come pick her up from school because she missed the bus and felt the need to call me every 4 minutes to see how much longer I would be before arriving at the school. Yeah my life rocks.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
My life is very hard right now on many levels, but then it's always been hard... I would say it's a mixture of good and bad and hope.

24. Do you hate anyone?
Not truly hate.

25. If we were to look in your Facebook inbox, what would we find?
Well, there's nothing in my "inbox" but I do have two Farm Town gift requests.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
Absolutely... but that doesn't really mean anything does it?

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
No, not in those exact words.

28. What song is stuck in your head?
Right now it's Rock-N-Roll by Eric Hutchinson.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be?
Ed McMahon trying to surprise me after receiving bad directions to my house.

30. Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50?
Hell no (however, my Nana was 49.8 when I was born).

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow:
Wake up, drive home, get the kids out the door for school, get ready for work, drive to work, sit at work, have lunch, sit at work, drive home, clean up, cook dinner, watch tv, deal with teenagers, deal with cats (7 cats people), eat dinner, go to bed. Oh and maybe fold a load of laundry.

32. Do you think too much or too little?
Too much.... but about too little.

33. Do you smile a lot?
Yes and I try to laugh even more. Disclaimer: many people think I am mad when I have no expression on my face so while it doesn't count as a non-smile it does count as a non smile moment.

Unbelievable

2009-08-09T20:33:00.000-04:00

There are times when I am thankful I have a digital camera handy because some of the stuff that happens around here is unbelievable.

It's hard to see (click pic to enlarge), but Jessica "colored" Stinky's nose with a pink crayon last night.

Unbelievable.

All in the family, part 1

2009-08-04T20:57:00.000-04:00

Okay, I know the sizes are off. I can't fix them because I am at Dale's and not on my laptop, but look at the faces of me (at left) looking all 60s and my mother (above middle) who was all 60s.

Tell me we aren't related!

Guns, Ammo, Corn

2009-08-03T20:25:00.000-04:00

I had this idea to post a picture of a scene I see daily.

There is a strip mall I pass daily that advertises three signs on the grass next to it. Each sign bears a single word...."Guns," "Ammo," "Corn." The first time I saw the signs, I knew I had to get a picture for my blog.

But I didn't.

I continued to pass the signs every day for a month before actually putting my digital camera in the glove box. And every day after that, I passed them without taking a picture. It was either raining or the traffic wasn't good or I was in a hurry or I just wanted to get home. "There would always be a chance tomorrow," I told myself.

So the perfect opportunity came about yesterday.

It was Sunday and I had the time. And I had my camera handy. Perfect.

As I approached the strip mall, I reached into my purse to grab the camera. I slowed down in order to pull into the parking lot, only I didn't see the signs.

They weren't there.

How could they not be there? They have been there for months... years maybe. Sometimes moved into different positions but there. I couldn't get my picture.

I blew it.

Today on my way home the signs were back.

I don't know if I'll ever get a picture of those signs now.

Hmmm

2009-07-17T20:32:00.000-04:00

Isn't it funny how as teenagers we had no problem telling our parents how the world worked because we knew everything..... and as adults we have no problem telling our teenagers how the world works because we know everything?

I get it now

2009-07-05T19:13:00.000-04:00

I've been thinking a lot about life lately.

Dale's father died last Tuesday (6/30). I didn't know him very long. I met him for the first time about 8 months ago. I wish I had met him when I was born. And I wish I had pictures to show you.

Dale's father was a very different sort of person... at least in my life experience. He was opposite of me politically.... and generationally (is that a word?).

But he had this "thing" about him that was so special. He was the kind of man who would reach out and befriend someone he didn't know. He was the kind of man who would mentor people younger and help them succeed. He was the kind of man who was worth his word. And he was funny as hell.

Most importantly, he accepted me as a member of his family from the second I met him and I am not exaggerating. He treated me like I was already married to Dale... like I was his daughter.

Three hours after Dale found out about his father's death, he found out that his brother Dusty had committed suicide next door to him.

I cannot imagine the anguish he went through that night. How does a person handle that?

I went with him to tell his mother the next morning. THANKFULLY she had already found out and Dale didn't have to tell her himself.. thank God for that. Thank God.

Fast forward to today.

I've sat with a woman who was in so much shock that she couldn't make a decision and was looking at me to help.

I've called my love to tell him goodnight in the middle of the worst night his life.... and I couldn't be there with him.

I've confirmed my belief that you can't judge a book by it's cover.

I've realized that I need a plan and I need to know my parents' plans.

I've realized that "my" world is not the same as "the" world.

And I have stayed up the better part of 5 days now and I am tired as hell.

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T20:08:00.000-04:00

It's been a very nice Mothers Day for me.

To start it off my mom came over and cooked me a breakfast casserole and we sat around and talked and watched old episodes of Soap.

Do you remember Soap? It was a dramody series that aired in the latter 1970s and was a parody of soap operas... very racy for its time... very tame for today's time.

Anyway, it was a nice morning. After mom left, I got started on my goals of grocery shopping, feeding dogs at Dale's place, and doing laundry. Oh and I also laid out for a little bit to try to get some color other than blinding white.

Later, after Jessica came home from her friend's house, she gave me the best gift of all.... a pair of the largest and most beautiful fake diamond earrings I have EVER seen (I'm wearing them right now) and a card with such a nice message it made me cry.

It's not the greatest gift because of what I received, rather given the amount of time we argue and stay mad at each other, it was a beautiful surprise!

For every one out there who is a mom, I tell you Happy Mother's Day. And for every one out there who is not a mom, I tell you call your MOM if you can.

THIS JUST IN......

Jessica just shoved her shoes in my face and explained that she stepped in "poop" and she didn't know where to put them.

After seeing those very shoes on top of the washing machine this morning and hurling them into her room (which is a total pig sty and I am not kidding), I suggested she put them in her room... and the next time she wore them the residue would wear off. I mean I didn't see anything.

So she proceeded to walk two or three steps over to the dining room and drop them right next to her tennis shoes.

Me: (Glaring and just noticing the tennis shoes) I didn't mean to drop them there.

Jessica: Well I'm not putting them in MY room.

Happy Mother's Day.

A new generation

2009-05-09T20:50:00.000-04:00

I just came across this picture on my desktop. A portrait of Jessica as expressed by Jason.

I caught Jason playing with Photoshop the other day and apparently he's learned how to use the Clone Stamp tool.

So it's not surprising to me that he would use it on a picture of his sister... seriously they are enemies lately.

And of course, Jessica would have a fit if she ever saw this, and I am ashamed to post it... really I am... but it's too funny not to.

I'm thrilled that Jason is experimenting with his creativity. It's awesome that he's learning Photoshop and gaining valuable job skills in a time when he's usually glued to the computer screen playing his online game with his comforter draped over his head.

Do I see a light ahead?

Oh and to be fair, here is the original pic:

My kind of yard

2009-04-26T20:43:00.000-04:00

There is this spot in my yard, by my driveway, that I've been wanting to redo since I moved in. It was filled with some kind of plant... green plant... that wasn't ugly, but wasn't what I wanted.

So, to celebrate the first anniversary of moving in, I decided to do something about it. Last week I began pulling out the old plants in order to get it ready for FLOWERS!!

My mom came yesterday and helped me finish the pulling and then we went to Esposito's to buy Impatiens. I decided on Impatiens because my yard is mostly shady all day and will not accommodate flowers that need lots of sun (drat it all).

Here is the previous bed (click pix to see it larger):

Here is the flower bed (yes I know it's a different angle.. just click to see it larger!):

The plants are very small right now but in time they will grow bigger and fill up the space. I love Impatiens and have them also in the flower boxes off my porch.

My mom planted Impatiens in my flower boxes last year and they were all the same color. This time, I had the idea to mix them up, which I am not sure she approves of... but hey I think they look "dashing" even though this picture doesn't show all the colors.

And Mom, you will be happy to know that I used pine bark mulch around the flowers. So much better than leaves.

Unmarriage revisited

2009-04-24T20:12:00.000-04:00

I was looking through my archives just now and came across this post:

http://theworldaccordingtoliane.blogspot.com/2008/02/unmarriage.html

I have to say that a year+ later I still have mixed feelings about everything that has happened between David and me... and from living the past year+, I have learned that these feelings are gonna stay with me forever. I can't forget my life just because I've "moved on."

It's okay though. There's no reason to stop feeling. I love him. I love him as a friend and he's proven that he's my friend time and time again.

I have a good relationship with David... much like we had when we were married. He is an honorable man. And he pays child support with NO problems. That in itself is appreciated, believe me.

But I also have a serious relationship with a wonderful man who loves me and shows it. He shows it by calling me out of the blue... by telling me he loves me practically daily. By snuggling with me. By sympethizing with me when my life is challenging.

My sweet Dale. He is everything to me. I have never loved a man as much as I love him. I wish we had met earlier.

Dang, I think that what I am trying to say is that I love my life. My life rocks!

Well that's not entirely true. I hate my job at the moment... and I hate dealing with my heathen-istic teenagers.... but other than that, things are good. I may not have a job this time next year but I know I have family and love.

I think I should go and take one of those Facebook quizzes to see if I'm doing things right!

What I know

2009-04-09T21:14:00.000-04:00

In 46 years I've learned that

It doesn't matter how old I am, I still feel like I did when I was young. My mind is aging beautifully but my body isn't.

The lyrics "All that I feel is the realness I'm faking," (Shattered, OAR) are pretty darn true.

No matter how much I explain... or talk about... or protest... or threaten... my children are never gonna pick up after themselves while they live with me.

There are people in this world who have no clue what a Datsun B210 is; much less a pop top.

You can win the hearts of others with humor.

You can get what you want by making scary changes.

I am smarter than I give myself credit for.

Adolesence is harder on the parent. It is.

May I have your attention please?

2009-03-05T18:19:00.000-05:00

Why do people put their annual tag renewal stickers on every corner of their license plate? Or worse... slap it right in the middle without a care?

The sticker goes in the top right corner. It goes there every year. You actually cover up or peel off the prior year's sticker.

I'm in such a peevy mood right now because of all the people out there who make me so. Here are a few more of my peeves. I bet some are yours too.

Why do people

leave their shopping cart in the middle of the aisle while they compare prices or chit chat and act oblivious to the fact that I'm standing there, staring at them, waiting to pass?

pull out in front of me when nobody is behind me?

stand directly next to me (and I mean inches away) at the checkout counter while I am still paying?

intentially block intersections? (Okay, sometimes I get caught unexpectedly in the middle of an intersection, but I make it a point to avoid doing that.)

misdial my phone number then proceed to leave me a message after listening to my voice mail?

speed in school zones just because it's not the peak time?

try to turn left across 5 lanes of traffic in the middle of rush hour? It's even worse if 2 out of the 5 lanes let them out because 75% of the time they block lanes 1 and 2 while waiting to complete their turn. Not only is this totally idiotic, it's very dangerous. People get killed this way.

I can't think of anything else at the moment as I am listening to upbeat, happy music but believe you me there is more to come.

Thoughts of Nikki

2009-02-27T19:28:00.000-05:00

I was thinking about Nikki.... who is very tired of being pregnant right now.... and it occurred to me that living with teenagers is like being pregnant.

The longer they are with you, the more you want them OUT!!

God speed Nikki!

P.S., okay, I feel like a terrible mom for saying that, but actually I really do feel that way at times. I think that nature is preparing me and "them" for the ultimate nest-leaving.

WTF????

2009-02-24T20:16:00.001-05:00

This is a current headline from the Yahoo home page:

• Infant, six others shot near Mardi Gras parade route *Photos

*The asterisk represents a camera icon that didn't come through to my post.

Now, to be fair, I didn't click on the story... or the PHOTOS... and read about it.... but does anyone else see what is wrong here?

A turkey of a turkey

2009-02-15T19:46:00.000-05:00

I had Tofurkey today.

Tofurkey is apparently a combination of tofu and turkey. Tofu and turkey? No wait, that would be a contradiction since it's vegan. Maybe it's tofu that tastes like turkey.

Anyway, I saw a pack in the grocery store yesterday and it looked really good. It was low in fat/calories and high in fiber. I've never had tofu so what the heck, I paid the $3.99 price for what the label said amounted to three servings of 5 slices each. The flavor I bought was Sun Dried Tomato.

The first thing I noticed about Tofurkey after opening the package was that it smelled an awful lot like canned dog food. That was not a good sign. But I decided to give it the benefit of the doubt and taste it. I pulled a piece off one of the very thin slices and took a bite. Not bad. But not great.

For breakfast this morning, I made a sandwich out of 2 of the Tofurkey slices. I toasted the bread and added mustard and tomato.

It was edible but it tasted nothing like turkey. It had no flavor except the fake flavor injected into it. Seriously, I can't understand why anyone likes it.

7 things you probably don't know about me

2009-02-04T19:22:00.000-05:00

I stole this idea from one of my favorite bloggers. The deal is to name 25 things about yourself that no one knows. That sounded like a piece of cake when I read it at lunch time, but now that I am really thinking about it, I can only come up with 7. At least for tonight...

1. I worked as a telemarketer.
It was only for about two weeks part-time when I was in my early 20s, but it was hell. I worked for the Rainbow International Carpet Cleaning and Dying Company (or was it dying and cleaning?).

Anyway, try saying that in it's entirety to someone who answers the phone during dinner before they hang up on you!

I actually shortened the script I was required to read so that it sounded more natural, but the supervisor overheard me and told me I had to follow the script.

I only had one sale.

2. I love boy bands.
I admit it. I specifically love N'Sync and the Backstreet Boys, but I only listen to them while I am in the car. I have actually experienced tennnis-elbow in my jaw because of all the singing-along I do to their music.

3. I used to work for Spencers. (you know, that store in the mall?)
My main responsibility was to straighten the shelves. I would elaborate but I just fell asleep.

4. I have seen the BBC miniseries of Pride and Prejudice a jazillion times.
I've seen it so many times, in fact, that I can recite the dialogue (in accent of course) without missing a beat, but I have never read the book.

5. I was almost in the movie "Something Wild."
If you don't know, part of "Something Wild" was filmed here in Tallahassee and my friend-at-the-time's family lived on the street they were shooting a particular scene on. It's the scene where Melanie Griffith comes out of her grandmother's house and goes to the car where Jeff Daniels is waiting and drives to the end of the street.

I was watching the lighting crew set up the scene with actor-doubles and someone noticed me through the bushes and told me I was in the shot but invited me to come down where they were filming and watch.

Anyway, I sat on the bank and watched the final scene along with the other neighbors. Melanie Griffith came around the back of the car in high heels and proceeded to slip on the pavement and fall on her backside.

I felt bad for her of course, but it was totally awesome.

6. My daughter was almost named Kelly.
I wanted to name her Jessica as soon as I found out "it" was a girl, but David didn't want that name. I knew her middle name would be Michel no matter what because it runs in my family, but after a grueling process I settled on Kelly.

Somewhere around August, however, when I was 8.5 months preggers, the name Jessica popped back in my head. I insisted to David that her name would be Jessica and he didn't resist. Smart, smart man.

And what foresight I had!! Turns out, she is nothing less than a Jessica.

7. I dye my hair.
I never thought I would be the type to do that, but my hair is turning silver faster than I am willing to accept, and, besides, I am tired of being blinded every time I look in the mirror.

It's not vanity mind you; it's a medical necessity.

Life is good

2009-01-19T20:38:00.000-05:00

Son is in kitchen eating chocolate chips (which came as a topping on yogurt).

Daughter is sitting at dining room table with an empty carton of yogurt (which came with a topping of chocolate chips).

Son throws a chocolate chip at Daughter.

Daughter protests and appeals to Mom.

Mom tells Son to stop, which appeases Daughter.

Son then throws another chocolate chip at Daughter.

Daughter protests louder and appeals to Mom... louder.

Mom tells Son to stop again and threatens loss of Xbox.

Son ceases chocolate chip throwing.

Daughter ceases protesting.

About a minute goes by.

Son walks into dining room and spits a chocolate chip onto Daughter.

Mom tries to conceal laughter but fails miserably and braces for Daughter's reaction.

Daughter looks at Mom and breaks out into laughter.

Life is good.

But still

2009-01-14T21:42:00.000-05:00

I had the neatest experience the other day.

I read my cousin's blog, as I do daily, and it was about a "quirky" object she owned and would never part with. That "quirky" object was a silver drinking cup given to her by her grandfather who had originally received it from the famous playwright Harold Pinter, who recently died.

My cousin's grandfather is famous too. His name is Paul Rogers and he is British. His first wife married my mother's father. Confused? He is my step grandfather once removed by all logical purposes... not actually related.

I have heard about Paul Rogers since I can remember but have never met, much less seen a picture of the man. Still it's a very cool feeling to know that someone who is sort of step-related to me is famous!

Famous for doing plays... or so I always thought.

I was reading my cousin's blog and she included a clip of him in the movie "The Homecoming," (1973), which was also a Broadway play.

It was too much. Finally, I had a chance to see what he looked like and how exciting is that!! I watched the clip with the same anticipation of a child sneaking out to get her Christmas stocking in the middle of the night.

After I saw the clip I had to show it to my coworkers, one of whom had actually taken a class about Harold Pinter when she was in college. I felt so proud showing him off, which is totally weird since he doesn't even know I exist.

But still.

I then Googled his name and found out that he has appeared in many movies, with many classic stars such as Laurence Olivier, Catherine Zeta-Jones [okay, work with me], Anthony Hopkins, Peter Finch, Liv Ullman, Rod Steiger, Anthony Quinn, David Janssen, Dame Judi Dench, Peter Ustinov, Terence Stamp, John Hurt, Stuart Whitman, Burl Ives, Maureen O'Hara.

OMG!!! Do I need to keep going???

I wish I could meet him just once. Just to ask him about his experiences. How great they must be. How great. But he is about 92 now and in England and has no clue who I am so I know that will never happen.

But still.

A room with a view

2008-12-11T19:56:00.000-05:00

The view from my front door last week.

My Japanese Maple.

The leaves have been green all year so this was a very nice surprise. You will remember that I am clueless when it comes to plants.

This picture doesn't do it justice at all. The leaves looked like fire.

They didn't stay this way long though. Within a day or so, they turned garnet and fell off.

Don't give me any SAS!

2008-11-21T09:22:00.000-05:00

I am learning SAS at work. SAS is a programming language used to produce statistical information/reports. "SAS" doesn't stand for anything; it's just SAS.

I am enjoying this educational challenge but there's a lot to learn and each section builds upon the last. You have to be in a learning frame of mind or you'll get lost.

It just so happens I'm NOT in a learning frame of mind this morning and after I read the following snippet 10 times, I felt an overwhelming urge to stop "learning" and blog.

Tell me this won't drive you to drink:

Specifying SELECT Statements without Expressions

If you don't specify a select-expression, SAS evaluates each when-expression to produce a result of true or false.

If the result is true, SAS executes the statement in the WHEN statement.

If the result is false, SAS proceeds either to the next when-expression in the current WHEN statement, or to the next WHEN statement if no more expressions are present, or to the OTHERWISE statement if one is present. (That is, SAS performs the action that is indicated in the first true WHEN statement.)

If more than one WHEN statement has a true when-expression, only the first WHEN statement is used; once a when-expression is true, no other when-expressions are evaluated.

It's only 9:30 a.m. I have a long day ahead of me.

A view on I-10

2008-11-13T08:35:00.000-05:00

Yesterday as I was traveling down I-10, I saw something I know I'll never see again.... a classic car from the 1950s towing a helicopter.

That's right. A helicopter.

Who ever heard of a car towing a helicopter???

Even if I had had my camera with me I would have never got that shot. I was doing 65 and the car was going in the opposite direction. So I searched the internet and I made this combined photo to approximate what I saw (sans the snow of course). The car was blue and white and the helicopter was much smaller and facing the other direction.

Ironically, the helicopter photo originally included the vehicle that was towing it..... a small Datsun-type station wagon.

Oh well. I guess it's not that uncommon after all.

Brace face

2008-11-09T15:50:00.000-05:00

Tinsel teeth.

Metal mouth.

Jessie got braces last Tuesday. I remember when I had them. I was so excited at first, but it sucked actually.

Braces are different in this day and time. The wire is Titanium and the brackets come in tons of colors. Neater still, she can change her bracket color each time she has an appointment if she wants.

BEFORE

AFTER

The pancake conversation

2008-11-08T20:41:00.000-05:00

The following is an actual conversation I had with Jason last night. He was hungry but didn't want what I made for dinner. He wanted me to cook him something.

Jason: Mommy I'm hungry.

Me: Well eat then.

Jason: There's nothing to eat.

Me: I made chicken pot pie.

Jason: I don't want that. It's disgusting; it has mushrooms.

Me: Well pick them out. There's not that many.

Jason: NO!! I'm not gonna eat that.

Me: Okay, then you're on your own. I'm not cooking anything else.

Jason: Mommy, I'm hungry, Mommy, I'm hungry, Mommy I'm hungry.... [this goes on for a bit. I ignore.]

Jason: What can I have? There's nothing to eat.

Me: Have a grilled cheese.

Jason: NO!

Me: Have a bowl of cereal or oatmeal.

Jason: NO!

Me: Have Ramen noodles then.

Jason: We don't have any more.

Me: Well then you're on your own.

Jason: I want pancakes.

Me: Okay, go for it.

[he goes into kitchen and I hear scuffling]

Jason: [yelling from kitchen] What do I do first?

Me: [yelling from living room] Read the instructions.

[silence]

Jason: How much do I make?

Me: How much do you want to make?

Jason: I only want one pancake.

Me: Well I don't know how to do that. Have something else.

[time goes by]

Jason: [in a very loud panicky voice] Where is the 3/4 cup?

Me: In the 2nd drawer.

Jason: What do I put it in?... I think I need the green bowl. [pause] It's dirty; it has Ramen noodles stuck to it.

Me: Well wash it then.

Jason: NO!

Jason: What else can I put it in?

Me: Use the Pyrex measuring cup.

Jason: NO! It has Ramen noodles stuck to it.

[pause]

Me: [sigh] Well why don't you just get all the dirty dishes together and have Ramen noodles?

[snicker]

Jason: Can I use this? [holds up a small Pyrex rectangular baking dish like you would make meatloaf in.]

Me: Sure.

[Jason comes in living room and sits down on couch, stirring the pancake batter in the Pyrex meatloaf dish.]

Jason: What temperature do I preheat the oven to?

Me: snicker.

[Jason dips a giant wad of batter onto his finger and shoves it into his mouth.]

Jason: This is disgusting!!

Me: [serious laughing] You retard!

[Jason goes back in kitchen. I hear cooking noises.]

Jason: Mommy, guess what I'm having for breakfast tomorrow?

Me: What?

Jason: Pancakes.

Me: That's nice.

Jason: Mommy, how do I know when to flip it?

Me: There will be bubbles.

Jason: What if there aren't any bubbles?

Me: Just give it time. [I begin to think about what is going on but refuse to go in there. That is exactly what he wants me to do.]

Me: What are you cooking it in?

Jason: Oil.

Me: No I mean what pan?

Jason: The pan I use to make grilled cheese.

Me: Cringing. [That pan is a griddle pan with ridges.]

I AM NOT GOING IN THERE.... I AM NOT GOING IN THERE!

[silence]

Jason: Was I supposed to preheat the oven to 400?

[more cooking noises.]

Finally, Jason comes into living room with a beautiful stack of three pancakes, complete with syrup, and shoves it in my face.

We are both grinning.

I knew he could do it.

Truckalicious

2008-10-25T19:31:00.000-04:00

I see all kinds of weird things when going to or from Dale's house. Wanna buy a truck?

Double talk

2008-10-01T18:36:00.001-04:00

Remember this picture of Jason multitasking?

When I knocked on Jessica's door because she had a phone call, she answered the door in mid-conversation on her cell phone.

I told her the phone was for "her" and handed her the phone fully expecting her to put her cell phone down. Instead, she put it up to her other ear and began talking as she walked back to where she was sitting.

A phone on each ear.

I stared for a moment as I closed the door. As I walked away, I thought about that picture of Jason.

Then I ran to get the camera. I went back into her room and took this pic.

Paul

2008-09-27T20:58:00.000-04:00

Paul Newman died yesterday.

I didn't find out until mid-day today.

He was a fantastic actor, director, and businessman.

He was an icon. Nothing like current times.

I am sad.

Flower hour... power

2008-09-13T20:06:00.000-04:00

Daily I see plants go in and out of bloom in my yard. Red, pink, purple, yellow, white, big, small, weird.

It has been this way since I moved in.

I am not plant-savvy at all, but I do know that I have several azalea bushes and a crepe myrtle though.

My plant-savvy mom, however, knows every type of plant in my yard and has told me all their names at least once, but I can't remember them.

Here are some pics I took today:
Flower box. Mom planted these flowers the weekend I went camping with Dale at Ginnie Springs. I still haven't written about it; sorry.

This is in the backyard in the courtyard area.

Little white flowers. Okay, I know it's blurry, but I can't get my digital camera to act like a real one.

This is in the front yard. I have no clue what it is.

Another flower in the front yard.

I wish the camera picked up the depth of color that is really there.

Pics

2008-09-01T21:32:00.000-04:00

Okay, so apparently I can upload pictures now!!

Here is that pic of Jason I took after his first driving lesson.

I love his expression. It's an expression I don't get to see very often.

Here are some more I have been meaning to share.

This one was taken at a metal recycling plant that I pass now and then going to/from Dale's place. I thought it was neat that there was so much twisted confusion going on around a vertically stationary speed limit sign. I'm sure you already got that though. :)

This is what my babies do when they are not being watched. They know they are not allowed on the counter or the chair seat....

This is a pic from a recent camping trip to Gennie Springs. I meant to post about it when I went at the end of July. But it hasn't happened yet. Tune in... :)

This is from a fireworks display at DecemberFest last year. It came out pretty good, even though I was hiding behind a bush due to the fact that the fireworks were extremely close to me at the time!!

I pass these trucks on my way home from work. They look like mommy and baby trucks to me.

Cell U Lar

2008-09-01T19:36:00.000-04:00

Lately Jessie has been bugging me to add texting to our cell phone plan. Texting, for those who don't know, is the equivalent of emailing, only it's from your cell phone.

"It's only $15 a month for unlimited texting," she repeatedly reminds me.

Texting is all the rage right now. All her friends do it. Apparently, they don't use their cell phones to talk anymore.

She bugged me incessently for a cell phone last year so she could talk to her friends. And I finally caved and bought her and Jason one because it made sense to me. I got a family plan and it's been a good thing actually.

But I refuse to pay for unlimited texting on a CELL phone. That is what email and instant messaging are for. I mean what's the point of having a cell phone if you don't talk on it????

And yet she still bugs me.

Today she started up again. Nothing I said seemed to satisfy her.

Jessica: Why can't I get texting? It's only $15 a month!

Me: I explain why.

Jessica: But how come?? All my friends have texting..... they don't talk on the phone anymore. If I had texting I could talk to my friends during the day instead of waiting to talk to them after 7pm.

Me: You don't need to be talking or texting anyone during the day when you are at school.

Jessica: But if you just get rid of the home phone we could afford it.

Me: I don't want to get rid of the home phone and, besides, if I did we wouldn't have internet anymore.

Jessica: Moment of understanding occurs, but fades quickly as she realizes that I am making sense.

But mom, it's only $15 a month and besides the phone I want to buy with my birthday money is for texting.

Me: Well buy a cheaper phone then.

This goes on for a while until finally she had had enough.

"THERE'S NO POINT IN HAVING A CELL PHONE IF YOU CAN'T TALK ON IT!!!!!"

What could I say? I just started laughing.

Thoughts of pink

2008-08-17T19:37:00.000-04:00

School starts tomorrow and, in true fashion, I waited until today to take Jessie shopping for school clothing. Her wardrobe consists of short shorts, mini skirts, tight-fitting shirts, tanks with thin straps, and pants with the knees ripped out.

She is starting a school that has a rather strict dress code. No shorts or skirts shorter than six inches above the knee when kneeling on a table (and believe me they measure!), no spaghetti strap tanks, and no pants with rips. Don't get me started on the boys' restrictions. I remember them well from when Jason began his sixth grade year.

Oh well, the point is that she has nothing that meets this criteria, which is mainly because her friends don't dress that way, which is mainly because the stores don't sell clothing that meets this criteria. Shorts are mini, skirts are mini, tanks straps are mini, and some jeans have rips. Okay, she ripped out the knees of her jeans, but that IS in style now.

We went to Target and found some items. Not much though. She began gravitating toward shirts. I explained that she needed bottoms, not tops. We ended up with a pair of Bermuda shorts that were brown and pink, a brown polo, and a pink polo. Okay, I know I'm a sucker.

Next we went to Walmart. They had nothing at first glance. The girls department looked like it had been wiped out by some plague. Surely there had to be something suitable; something that met the dress code criteria.... but all the shorts were too short, all the skirts were too short, and all the tanks had thin straps that were too thin.

The items I did happen to find that met the criteria were all pink for some strange reason. I suggested a camouflage pair of Capris that were pink.

Nope.

I suggested a solid pair of Capris that were light pink.

Nope.

"Nothing pink, Mom! I'll tell you when I find something I like."

Enough said. I shut my mouth. I followed her around and reminded her of her size, when she found items that were way too small or large. She soon found a brand of jeans that she liked., and there were a variety of shades (styles) so she picked three different pairs and tried them on. They all fit.

Then we went to look for tennis shoes. The very first pair she spotted she loved. They were black and pink. Really cute. We found her size and tossed them into the buggy.

As they settled into the buggy, I couldn't help but notice that there was pink in the shoe. Come to think of it, previously she had tossed in a lunchbox that was pink and convinced me she needed it because her old one had broken. And come to think of it, she wants her bedroom walls to be painted pink.

Yet, she didn't like any of the pink items I suggested.

Soleful reflection

2008-08-14T21:37:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time when I was in my earliest 20s, I had this pair of shoes.

They were black patent, flat-heeled "pumps" with a bow on top. They were beautiful and went with everything... I wore them a lot. I dressed for work back then; back when I had the energy to wear panty hose.

Fast forward 20-something years to about five years ago.

I was in Goodwill on my lunch break, perusing the merchandise, scoffing at the overpriced items.....overpriced used items, mind you....and I happened across a pair of black patent, flat-heeled "pumps" with a black bow on top.

OMG, I thought. These are the exact same shoes I used to have that I loved. I immediately looked at the size. They were a size 6. I usually wear a 6.5 wide or a 7 regular so I could handle a 6 I thought. I took off my tennis shoes and crammed the right shoe onto my socked foot.

It fit!!!

Well it fit because I made it fit; but it fit regardless, so I bought them and immediately threw them in my closet for a few days before I actually wore them to work.

The first day I wore them to work, I was so proud. I felt young again. I was the me of my earliest 20s. And they fit just right with knee-highs. I was hot.

Just after I got to work, however, I noticed that part of the shoe, the patent part, had creased from the movement of walking and had flaked off leaving a white crooked line on the shoe. I tried to fix it by putting scotch tape over the crease, but I put the tape on crooked. I pulled the tape back up, because I can't have a crooked piece of tape on my shoe, and when the tape came off so did the patent black.

Crap.

I grabbed a black sharpie, an old trick of mine, and colored the white jagged line until it was invisible.

There.

An hour or so went by. I was walking down the hallway to my office and the sole of my right shoe began to come off. It's a feeling I cannot describe.

Crap.

My boss suggested that I use Spray Mount to adhere the sole to the shoe again. I found the spray and went outside.

It worked. The sole stuck and all was good. But my elated feeling was slowly deflating. After all, I had a glued on sole and now there were a thousand more creases in the black patent.

When my friend and coworker Alice came around for tea (that is my morning break), we headed for the kitchen and I began telling her about what had happened with my shoes... how they were the epitome of my youth; how they made me feel young again... how they had cracked and how the sole had come undone only to get reglued... how I had overcome all that and was still positive.

Just before we approached the kitchen door, my left sole came off. I am not kidding you. It came off exactly after I had told her about the right sole coming off.

It came off right on cue. I had to be on some comedy show.

We looked at each other and then cracked up.

My beautiful black patent, flat-heeled "pumps" with a bow on top shoes that represented my youth were dry rotted! There was no use trying to glue on the left sole, even though I tried and I tried, believe me.

I learned a valuable lesson from that experience. I knew my youth wasn't dead just because those shoes were dead... I know my age but I don't feel it. That experience taught me that you should never try to go back in time. You should appreciate the past, and learn from it, but you should always push forward.

Alphabet

2008-08-06T20:40:00.000-04:00

Okay, I'm a blogger, but not an "official" blogger because, as my son reminds me frequently, I only have two readers.

My cousin Sayre (a/k/a Sarah) is a true blogger. She writes faithfully, participates in activities with other bloggers, and has even won awards for her blog. And she does all that despite having to raise a son, raise a husband, and raise a career.

She is my hero. My blogger hero, among other things.

There have been many times I wanted to respond to my cousin's "Fun Monday" challenges but I didn't. I couldn't, because I am sporadic when it comes to blogging... as you well know. I am not dependable.

But Sayre (a/k/a Sarah) has "Alphabet Tagged" me, and I have never been tagged. I must respond.

So here is my Alphabet Tag:

Attached or single? Reattached.

Best friend? My cousin Sayre (a/k/a Sarah). I don't really have any friends. Technically she is not a "friend", she is family... but she is my best friend because she is hears me. She listens to me. She makes me remember who I am.

Cake or Pie? Cake. Chocolate cake.

Day of Choice? Friday. Friday represents the end of the week and the end of the crap and craziness that is my week.

Essential Item? scissors.

Favorite color? orange.

Gummy bears or worms? I would rather eat a bear than a worm.... the bears are smaller.

Hometown? Tallahassee.

Indulgence? Steak.

January or July? Both. January because I love winter over summer. July because it's the month I met Dale.

Kids? No thank you. I have enough.

Life isn't complete.... without a cat. {lmks to scrss: so true}

Marriage Date? First time: March 16, 1990, second time: 12th of never.

Number of Brothers and Sisters? 1 sister.

Oranges or Apples? Oranges... but not orange juice.

Phobias? Heights.

Quote? One of my own: "It's better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it."

Reasons to Smile? Being true to myself on a daily basis; watching my children learn that they do not know more than me; and in contradiction, watching my children realize they have taught me something.

Season of Choice? Fall.

Tag Seven People? Okay, I only know 2 people who blog.... 1) the person who tagged me, and 2) my cousin Cathy. Hey Cathy, are you out there?

Unknown Fact? I saw Ted Turner and Jane Fonda at Hooters on Christmas Day. {Okay, it's not "unknown;" actually, I called everybody I could think of at the time.}

Vegetable? This is too hard. I can't just pick one. I'll pick three: yellow squash, Lima beans, potatoes.

Worst habits? Biting nails, trying to control the lives of everyone around me.

XRay or Ultrasound? Ultrasound.

Your favorite food? Cheese.

Zodiac sign? Pisces. I am fish.

Driving 101

2008-08-03T21:39:00.000-04:00

Jason had his first driving lesson yesterday.

I was occupied with laundry and peeling wallpaper, and somehow we go onto the subject of checking accounts.

So he passed the quiz that my credit union requires of teens to get a checking account ....and he got psyched. And, hey, since he was all "psyched" about getting his own checking account, I asked him if he wanted to have his first driving lesson.

I fully expected him to reply "no," being as that was his reply the other 4,000 times I had asked him that question since receiving his license.

But instead he replied "yes." Dang... now I would actually have to teach him to drive. I have been excited for him since he got his license, but at the same time, I have been very nervous about teaching him on a manual transmission.

So, here I was. Son in driver's seat. Me in passenger seat. The first thing he asked was "Why is the seatbelt on the wrong side?"

We got down to business. I had the "simple" task of teaching him to let off the clutch at the same time he pushed the gas pedal.

It is SO hard to teach something that is natural to me; that I don't think about. He did very well with it all though... he only flooded the car a few times and he only conked out a few hundred times. It was all good.

After about an hour, he had had enough of his lesson so I got behind the wheel and headed back home. I described to him how it felt when I had my feet in motion.... and he wanted another try. This time he did it almost perfectly! It clicked with him. He finally understood what I had been trying to say, and asked me why I hadn't just done that to begin with.

We pulled in the driveway. He was grinning. I was grinning and so proud of him. Proud of him for continuing without giving up, even though I know he was frustrated many times.

I gave him a hug and told him to get in the car because I wanted to take a picture of him behind the wheel. Before we began the lesson, I had stashed the camera in my purse thinking I would get an "action shot" of him driving.... but my purse ended up in the back seat and unavailable. And just as well. I don't think it would have been a cool "mom" move to whip out a camera while he was in the throes of clutching!

At least he allowed me to photograph him at the end. I can't get the photo to upload so you'll have to imagine it!

Arachnophobia?

2008-08-01T20:28:00.000-04:00

I had a visitor with me on my trek to work and back today. A banana spider. At least I think it was a banana spider. It's some kind of large spider... and I don't like large spiders.

My yard has several of them right now. They build their webs everywhere, which I am not pleased about, but as long as they stay out of my way, I don't mess with them.

Jessica displaced one the other day. He had set up his home near the carport about a month before. I noticed that he wasn't in his web one day and wondered what happened to him.

Well, he went directly across the carport and built a web over the wicker couch swing. However, he was displaced from there toot-sweet because Jessie uses that swing a lot. He then proceeded to build his web on the other side of the carport next to my car. Well that was an unacceptable location so I gently moved him from there into the bushes.

This morning as I was traveling on I-10, doing 65, I happened to look in my rear view mirror and noticed a banana spider barely hanging on to the top of my back window. The only thing holding him on from what I could tell was some spider web. He was flapping in the breeze and I was amazed he had held on so long.

The next time I looked in my rear view mirror, he was gone. I figured he blew away. After all it's hard to hold on when you are in 65mph winds.

I went to work. Parked. Went to lunch. Parked. Left work. Went to Publix.

On the way to my car with my purchase, I was walking next to a couple who were just slightly ahead of me. As I approached my car, the woman began walking toward my car with a look of fascination. I was wondering what exactly she was doing looking at my car.

I soon saw what she had spied. It was the banana spider on the back of my car... and I mean the side back. Right near the key hole to open the trunk. He was so completely still that I wasn't even sure if he was alive. By the way, it's hard to tell in the picture, but that spider is about 3 inches long from leg tips.

I was amazed that this spider was still around and I told the woman my story about being on I-10. She left and then came back with her husband. Then another couple showed up to look at it.

Seeing the spider actually made an impression on them. One guy started talking animatedly about a "pet" spider he once had, and we all listened and commented. It was really neat to see strangers come together to discuss something as odd as the spider on my car like that.

I left Publix and drove home. I thought surely he would have blown off, but he didn't. I gently removed him from my car and placed him in some bushes FAR away from my car.

Jessica thinks this spider is a stalker.

I am curious to see where he will settle this time.

On another note. Jessica made very good progress with the wallpaper removal. Take a look at the current status:

To Do or Not to Do

2008-07-31T21:16:00.000-04:00

It was bound to happen.

I bought this place and it is covered in wallpaper that is not me.

It's Victorian, actually. Not bad mind you; but not me.

So what that means is that I will have to remove the wallpaper from the ENTIRE house at some point, and proceed from there.

I intend to do that, only there is the "keeping the house clean" problem to deal with daily, as well as the "keeping the yard maintained" problem that seems to be daily, being that it is summer and we've had a LOT of rain.

Speaking of summer, my lovely daughter has been complaining about how bored she is.

I bought her puzzles when she showed an interest. I let her run around in the creeks of Indian Head Acres so she could hang out with her friends, even though I was apprehensive about it. Okay, I used to live there when I was a child and I know what I did when I lived there and OMG not my child!!)...and I allowed her to go to sleep overs. But, still, she is bored.

I digress.

This afternoon, as we were preparing to go to daddy's house, I noticed a piece of wallpaper border coming unglued in the dining room. It was installed just above the chair rail. I had actually seen the peeling wallpaper before but ignored it because fixing it was way too far down on my "to do" list to worry about.

I pulled it.

I pulled it and Jessie saw me!! She immediately went into "wallpaper removal" mode. If you don't know what I am talking about, then back up in the archives a couple years. You will see.

She got so into it... I got into it. It was hard to get her to stop, but we had to leave. She professed that pulling wallpaper would be the greatest part of her summer vacation and vowed to begin first thing tomorrow. God help me.

Here is the damage:

You know, of course, that this means I have to deal with the dining room now.

Just another "to do" for my list.

The Jess

2008-07-27T21:56:00.000-04:00

Recent pics of the daughter...

Tell me she doesn't look like LAURIE!!!

Okay, a dark-haired Laurie, but come on... the lips on the bottom pic are so her (click pic for a larger view)!!

Gun show

2008-07-12T22:22:00.000-04:00

I went to a gun show today.

I never thought in a million years I would go to one.

Well, to be fair, it was a gun and knife show.

A couple of weeks ago Dale asked me if I wanted to go to it with him. I answered yes because he has done things with me that interest me, even though I know he was cringing the entire time.

So I said yes.

We arrived around noon. The admission was $6.00 per person.

I had asked him earlier in the week how much the admission fee was, and he said he thought $5.00. A $5.00 admission fee seemed excessive; I mean we would only be looking at guns....and okay, knives. But $6.00?

So we went in.

I didn't want to go... ya know, but I was determined to stick it out and be positive. That's what love is about... give and take.. I totally know that.

The place was packed with people. Mostly men, but there were some couples.

The first couple I noticed was a mirror of us. The man was studying the merchandise..intently...and the woman was standing next to him trying not to look bored. That was me.

But as boring as it was, I did see some pretty neat looking guns, including a rifle used in the Civil War. We went from one booth to the next looking at what seemed like the same merchandise we had just seen.

I got excited when we neared the last booth. Finally, we could leave! However, the only way out was through another building, which was also full of guns and knives. I begged Dale to look quickly as we had already been there two hours. So he did and we ended up leaving with sore feet about 30 minutes later.

My son is allowed to drive

2008-06-24T20:16:00.000-04:00

Jason got his learner's permit today. I feel so old.

He actually failed the first time he took the test, missing just a couple over the allowed limit, so David took him again today.

I am so excited for him because I think it's a big deal to get your driver's license.

I remember when I got my first license.... learner's permit. It was freedom, even though there had to be an adult sitting in the front supervising.

At the time, the "adult" in my life was Nana; my grandmother. Whenever we drove anywhere, she was by my side and my sister was in the back criticizing.

At 16, I could drive solo. Nana suddenly ended up in the back seat. I was cool then. And, driving solo made me feel grown up. I volunteered to drive any where, any time, and for any reason.

Now, I get to teach Jason to drive and I am terrified. I know he will be a good driver but it's scary to think of him controlling something so big.

Here he is. Good pic, I must say, considering his hair is so long. At least he parted his bangs so his eyes are visible.

I asked him if I could take his license to work with me tomorrow because I wanted to show it off to my coworkers.

He said no.

The shirt that wasn't

2008-06-15T21:33:00.000-04:00

I was folding laundry and came across a girl's shirt that's wasn't Jessie's.

It is not uncommon to find myself folding unfamiliar laundry. Laundry that is way cooler than the stuff I buy my kids. I swear, Jessie has the best wardrobe going... and it consists mainly of items she has inherited from friends.

But for every piece she has inherited, a piece has been bestowed... believe me. I can't tell you how many items of clothing I have bought her only to see it worn once or twice before it "disappears."

So, anyway, I am folding laundry and find a shirt I don't recognize.

It was the kind of shirt that has the illusion of a shirt on top of a tank-top. They are cool indeed, but when they are inside-out and you are trying to get them rightside-out, they are not cool.

I fussed with it. I fought with it. I twisted it this way and that, but I could not get the shirt to look right. And I would need it look right before I could fold it. After all, I am compulsive that way.

Maybe the extra shirt was supposed to drape off the left hand shoulder, I thought to myself as I wrestled with the fabric.

I held it up and studied it. Then something became obvious to me.

The combo shirt was not a combo shirt after all. It was a tank top AND the skirt that went to her bathing suit held together by static electricity.

I'm quizable

2008-06-13T20:24:00.001-04:00

I have to say, I take these kinds of quizzes a LOT.

So much, in fact, that I have learned that you can evoke a different outcome just by clicking the refresh button.

I don't usually post the results from the quizzes I take, but with this quiz, I think the results are dead-on. Well, dead-on except that I don't make decisions easily..... For better or worse, I make them rather quickly, actually.

You Are a Centaur

In general, you are a very cautious and reserved person.

However, you are also warm hearted, and you enjoy helping others in practical ways.

You are a great teacher, and you are really good at helping people get their lives in order.

You are very intuitive, and you go with your gut. You make good decisions easily.

What Mythological Creature Are You?

Bedfellows

2008-06-11T20:42:00.000-04:00

I gave away Jason's bed today.

A few weeks ago I heard about a really neat site from a friend of Dale's. It's a Yahoo group called tallyfreecycle. It's free to join but you have to live in Tally... I am sure there are sites like this in other cities... Anyway people either offer things they don't want anymore or people ask for items they want.

So I joined and, for the heck of it, posted a WANT ad asking for a double bed for my teenage son who had outgrown his single bed. I figured it was probably unreasonable to ask for such a big-ticket item but I had nothing to lose. The next morning I had an email from a woman who had a bed for me.

I couldn't believe it. I got what I asked for!!

Dale and I went to pick it up last Sunday morning. It's a beautiful Windsor-style bed with head/foot boards and a brand new mattress.

So then I had his bed to deal with. First I asked Jason if it wanted to take his bed to his Dad's apartment to use. He said no. So I decided I would give it to someone on the freecycle site.

Before I could post an ad, I saw a WANT ad from a single mom who needed two twin beds. I emailed her and told her I had one I could give and she gladly accepted. She arranged to come over tonight to pick it up. Around 7:30 she called and told me her mother was coming in her van and confirmed the directions.

When her mother arrived, she pulled into the driveway but didn't get out. I walked down and introduced myself. She told me that she was deathly afraid of cats. Jess and I put all the cats in a room and proceeded to help her carry out the bed frame and mattresses.

Now I have to tell you, the van this woman was driving was filled up with stuff... 3 child seats and at least a 48-bulk pack of toilet paper... I swear to you.... and I couldn't help thinking, "What was this woman thinking by sending her mother to pick up a bed in a van loaded with crap??"

She loaded the head/foot boards in the front passenger seat.

She loaded the rails in the middle section.

Then, after some experimentation, we loaded the box spring through the back so that it rested on the head rests of the middle seat.

The main problem was the mattress. There was no way it was gonna fit inside the van. NO WAY.

Then the woman said she was going to fold the mattress.

OMG, I thought to myself. First of all, everyone knows you can't just fold a mattress. And second of all, even if it could be folded it would surely break. But the woman, who was a seasoned mover, had it under control. So we loaded the folded mattress into the van and off she went with many thanks.

All in the family

2008-06-10T09:33:00.000-04:00

Create your own family sticker graphic at pYzam.com

Here we are.

Me (Liane): 45, overweight, curlyish greyish-black hair, bifocals, usually stressed out... a/k/a mommy or "mother" in the event one of them is put out with me. I prefer Queen of the Universe... only I can't seem to get anyone to refer to me that way.

I try to do everything right.... hence the halo... but I don't always get things right.

P.S., I do have eyebrows.

Jason: No aliases that I know of. 15 1/2 and in the throes of adolescence. About to be a sophomore in high school and knows everything. His hair is longer than the cartoon depiction and almost covers his eyes... it's also much darker than many of you may remember. He is tall and lanky with a low voice... monotone for the most part, as he usually only speaks in one-word sentences. There wasn't a soccer outfit choice, so I went with golf because that is his new sport interest. He watches it on t.v. for hours (yawn). He is also interested in tennis but only plays occasionally with his friends. He's rekindled his interest in soccer. He tried out for a new travel soccer team last week and we are waiting to find out if he made it.

Jessica: a/k/a Jess or Jessie. 13 1/2 and going into 7th grade. Also in the throes of adolescence but speaks (or yells) in fluent sentences. There is no doubt that she will be taller than me as an adult. She is almost as tall as me now... at least in her platform flip flops. Of course when I tell people that, they always reply, "what's your point?"

She definitely has a figure now and looks well beyond her age body-wise. She is into cooking, but not cleaning, and wants to be a chef. Next school year, she will be in chorus. She loves to wear jewelry but is not good at keeping up with it. After she lost all of her earrings, she lost all of mine. She is obsessed with Vera Bradly bags and other name-brand clothing thanks to her friends whose parents can afford them.

Spot: a/k/a spottums or bott bott. Our oldest cat. He is black with white. He is very aloof and spends most of his time sleeping in strange places and hissing at the kittens.

Stinky: a/k/a stinky boy or stinkweed or stinkwad. Raised from the bottle at 2 weeks; thinks he's a person. He is very social although he is scared of everything, which is highly annoying to me. He is very vocal and talks to us in tones we seem to understand. He tolerates the kittens and tries to play with them occasionally.

Bacon and Spike: a/k/a bacon-bit and spikey. Our newest family members. Raised from the bottle at 2 weeks; now 8 weeks old. They bounce all over the house and explore everything. And by explore, I mean get into places where they should not be. Funny as hell to watch. Bacon (named by Jessie) looks almost exactly like Stinky... grey/black tabby. Spike (named by Jason) is grey and white tabby.

I'm baaaccck... well sort of

2008-05-20T08:37:00.001-04:00

As is the norm with me, when things are going smoothly I get bored and have to shake them up. SO much has happened since my last post and it's overwhelmingly overwhelming to try to catch you up now.

Here's the Reader's Digest version of my life since March..... I bought a new home (mobile home) back in my old neighborhood. The main move is this weekend but I have been packing/moving all month. I traded my gas-hog Jeep for a Honda Civic (5-speed), which I absolutely LOVE. I adopted 2 two-week-old kittens who are now five weeks old and finally on solid food. I still have my same children and job, however.

Needless to say I am tired. This week is kicking my butt, and next week will be worse. Here's something to hold you until I feel like writing. I can't say I disagree with any of the results really.

You Are 6: The Loyalist

You have strong relationships and are intensely loyal.

People find you easy to love and care for.

You like your world to be stable and secure, no surprises.

You're cautious. You prefer your inner circle to the outside world.

At Your Best: You are courageous, a positive thinker, and expressive. You can take on the world.

At Your Worst: You are secretly insecure - which makes you sarcastic, cold, and argumentative.

Your Fixation: Doubt

Your Primary Fear: Abandonment

Your Primary Desire: Security and support

Other Number 6's: Mel Gibson, Woody Allen, Jay Leno, Marilyn Monroe, and Julia Roberts.

What Number Are You?

Get 'r done

2008-03-20T08:30:00.000-04:00

Thanks to my cousin for rescuing me from my inability to post anything on my blog lately. I borrowed this from her blog.

Hmmm, I've done 53 of the things listed below. I guess I need to get a life! How many have you done?

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain (not successfully however)
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise (more like stayed out all night...)
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game (is FSU football considered huge?)
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne (NEVER doing that again!)
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can (seems I do that on a daily basis)
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36.Danced like a fool and didn’t care who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them (did on a train dining car)
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud (mud puddle)
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie (was almost in a movie... "Something Wild". The crew were setting up the camera angles, rehearsing the scene, and noticed me watching from some bushes at my friend's house and I was in the "shot", so they invited me to come closer to watch.)
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Gotten flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone (anywhere my kids are)
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart (I don't know for sure, but I imagine so)
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet (only for about 2 hours though when I was 10. I came home with it on my head and my dad freaked out)
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

Earring woes

2008-02-18T21:11:00.001-05:00

Jessica lost an earring.

She is not good with keeping up with her jewelry... or any of her stuff for that matter. She has one of every earring pair she's ever owned. And I have one of every earring pair I've ever owned, thanks to her.

Anyway, she left her new pearl earrings on my bathroom counter; so excited to wear them with her matching pearl necklace and new outfit to school. Fake pearls of course, and big.

It was Monday morning and she had waited, once again, until the last minute to shower and get ready for school.

I was stressed.

It was almost 7:30 a.m., and I needed to leave to get Jason to school. She was worried about finding that earring and wanted me to help her look.... and she wouldn't take no for answer.

I told her I didn't have time to help her look; that she had waited too long to get ready and I had to leave. If she wanted to look, that was fine. She could walk over to Rob's later, since she didn't need to be there until 8:15.

Well that didn't sit well with her and an argument ensued. I ended up leaving her at home to walk over. Before I left, however, I put the remaining earring in a safe place.

A week went by and nothing more was said about the earring.

Yesterday, while Jessie was in the shower, I took her folded clothes from the laundry into her room. As I walked through the door I noticed something on the wall ahead of me.

I put her clothes down and walked closer. It was a pearl earring, just like the one she lost, sticking out of the wall.

Out of the wall?

I looked closer and, sure enough, it was the same one she lost. I ran to my bathroom to check if the earring I put away was still there, and it was.

She found her earring at some point and stuck it into an existing nail hole in her wall... not one of her 4 jewelry boxes mind you, but the wall.

I took a picture because it was just too weird, but alas, I don't have any AA batteries at the moment, so I can't upload it until I get some.

Check back to see the pic!!

More trash talk

2008-02-10T21:53:00.000-05:00

I love trash day.

Well, the evening before actually.

It's when people around my neighborhood put out their trash for the pick-up on Monday afternoon.

I always roll my can out on Monday morning, but I am the only one, as my neighbors have surely noted.

Anyway, the people in this subdivision throw away the best things.

Since I've been here, I've inherited

• a trash can for Jessica's room (right after she had requested one);
• 2 lawn chairs (right after I was going to buy one and learned that they cost more than $10);
• a 4-drawer plastic organizer chest on wheels (that Jessica immediately wanted to use for a dresser, but that's another story);
and, just now...
• a metal shelf perfect for storing things in the garage.

and I've seen many more things discarded that were perfectly good.

It's a matter of convenience, I know, to just throw things away. I've done it before....and still do it, and I know all this stuff should be donated to some charity.

But it's just easier to leave it with the trash.

And it's fun to find.

Unmarriage

2008-02-06T18:56:00.000-05:00

It's official.

I am divorced. I am a divorcee. Do I look any different?

A year of anticipation culminated in a 15-minute court appearance and "poof" it was final.

I didn't even know it until I called David to ask what happened in court. I figured it would take 30 days or so after the court date. But nope. It was final right then... probably at 2:45 this afternoon.

I am a little sad that that part of my life is officially over; but I am also happy that I can proceed with the next part of my life.

Brutally fruity

2008-01-31T10:09:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't posted in a while.... been busy.... been lazy. I saw this on my cousin's blog and took the test. I think it's pretty on target, except my hair isn't green.
.

You Are a Pear

You are independent, intelligent, and a free thinker.
You can accomplish great things, especially when you do them on your own.

You are direct, honest, and sometimes even a bit brutal.
There's not much that gets in the way of you and your ambition.

While you are hard nosed, you do have a much sweeter side to you.
It takes times for you to soften toward someone, but once you do, you'll be their friend for life.

What Type of Fruit Are You?

Circle of wine

2008-01-11T21:44:00.000-05:00

I went to another wine tasting tonight.

Actually, this was my third. The second never happened.

The second was just before Christmas at a place called the Wine Warehouse. Dale and I arrived in our usual casual attire and quickly noticed that the attire was not casual; it was business formal. To make matters worse, the snooty woman behind the counter informed us that reservations were required and we didn't have one.

Anyway, we went to our third wine tasting.

Dale paid the admission and, as we picked up our wine glasses, the woman cashier informed us that it was very crowded; that way more people had shown up than expected.

It was okay, we said, and we made our way to the room where the wine was.

We walked in and stopped short. It was a tiny room and I noticed immediately that there was a line; only I couldn't determine where the line ended. I asked the closest person to me and she said that there wasn't an end to the line; that they were basically walking in a circle, sampling wine from the only table set up, and continuing in their circle until they came back around to the table again for more. She said we could merge in ahead of her, so we did.

Unlike my other wine tasting experience, the majority of people there were older than me and VERY friendly. The woman ahead of us turned around and filled us in on how things worked. She told us of her wine tasting experience so far... what she had sampled and how she liked it.

I was ahead of Dale as we approached the table. I asked for something red and NOT dry and the man poured me a Pinot Noir of some sort. I took a sip. It wasn't bad at all. I moved away from the table and turned around to find out what Dale had been given.

He had something white. He told me it was his third sample.

Third??, I asked.

Yep, he said. He had slammed the first two down.

It made total sense to me since we had to circle around to get another sample (and it was crowded). So the next time we came around, I did the same thing. Only the other red wines were terrible and terribly expensive.

On our last round, I got a rose sample, which is technically considered a white wine. It was the best of the types I had sampled.

By the time we left, most of the people had left as well. We looked around the store part and checked out the neat bottles.

This wine tasting experience was definitely better than my first, but I have come to the conclusion (as has Dale) that the cheaper the wine, the better it is.

Christmas Eve'ing

2007-12-24T21:28:00.001-05:00

The fire is embers now and it's 9:30. It's been a great Christmas Eve. I was wondering how it would go. My son, who is in his adolescent funk..... and my daughter, who is in her pre-adolescent funk... experiencing our first Christmas Eve without daddy.

They didn't fight.

He was in a good mood. She was in a good mood.

We built a fire. We were going to go drive around and look at lights—me and Jessie, but Jason didn't want us to go... nor did he want to accompany; so Jessie agreed we could stay home.

They are in bed now and I have a lot to do.

Here are some pics of the night.

Jessie, in her room watching High School Musical 2.

Jason playing his PSP not wanting to be photographed.....

and running from me and my camera.

The kids played and had a pillow fight. Amazingly it didn't end with someone crying.

Jessie being the ham she is.

Our tree.

Dang it, you can't see the lights. It's a beautiful tree filled with memories and hopes.

It's been such a nice night.

No tools required

2007-12-23T21:04:00.000-05:00

I wanted to get Dale a really good gift.

He said he wanted a Skil Saw, and I got him one, but I wanted to get him something else. Something he would like that he didn't ask for.

I had no clue what to get, so I asked his best friend Mike and he suggested a grill. What a great idea I thought. He needed a new grill. His old one was falling apart.

I went to Home Depot first and then Lowes to check out the inventory. Lowes had a nice gas grill. It was smaller than his old one, but very nice and in my price range. I decided to purchase it unassembled because I wasn't sure it would fit in my jeep, and, besides, the box said "No tools required."

How hard could that be?

I didn't get around to assembling it until the last minute. It was Thursday afternoon and the kids were going to David's. I had to assemble it now because I would be with Dale on Thursday and Friday and we had planned to exchange gifts on Saturday.

So it was 4:30 on Thursday afternoon and I had to leave to take the kids to David's at 5:40. That should be enough time to assemble the grill I thought.

I dragged the box into the living room (it was very heavy) and proceeded to unpack the pieces... pulling off cardboard and plastic and tossing it to the side. After I got all the pieces unloaded, it looked like a cardboard factory had exploded in my living room.

I was beginning to have doubts assembling this thing. I didn't realize there would be so many pieces. Then I saw the 2 bags containing all the screws, bolts, washers, etc. There must have been 100 of them.

I stared at the instructions in disbelief. What have I done? But I only had about 45 more minutes to spend before having to leave.

I set about trying to assemble the first 2 pieces and couldn't. I got half of it done but the other half wouldn't line up. In the meantime, the kids had taken over the box that everything came in and were in the process of fighting about who was gonna get inside.

By the time 5:40 rolled around, I was completely stressed out and had accomplished nothing. I couldn't even get past instruction #1. I decided to pack everything back into the box and take it back. I called Lowes and explained my problem to Brian, who said to just bring it back.

After spending another 5 minutes trying to get the kids out of the box, I began the process of trying to put all the pieces BACK into the box. I managed to get them back in, but it was nowhere near the same way they came out.

And, in the rush to get the car loaded and the kids out of the house, I forgot to bring the receipt. The guys at Lowe's were terrific, however. They took my box of parts and sent it back to be assembled and let me pick one from the inventory they had out front.... and they did it all so that no receipt was required. Thank goodness for that!

I took the grill over to Dale's Friday morning after he had left for work and set it next to his deck hoping that he would not notice it. He didn't. Then I wrapped up a note telling him to go look out his back deck. I gave it to him last night and he liked it, so it was all worth it.

Lessons learned: 1) NEVER buy anything like that unassembled; 2) If I ever do, NEVER wait until the last minute to assemble it.

Christmas queries

2007-12-16T20:01:00.000-05:00

I stole this questionnaire thingy from my cousin's blog. She participates in a group of bloggers who do "Fun Mondays" which gives a topic and each person writes a blog about that topic as well as things like this. I have never participated in the past because -- as you well know -- I am not a reliable blogger. I liked this one however so here goes.....

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper usually because it's more cost effective; but I do the gift bag thing as well because I absolutely HATE to wrap presents. In fact, anyone who receives a present wrapped by me will notice how much unattention to detail it gets. Unlike David, who spends enormous amounts of time wrapping presents so that each crease and fold is perfect or my mom who uses the most beautiful paper and handmade bows and such to wrap presents that you don't even want to open because it is so pretty, I prefer to slap on the paper, tape the shit out of it and stick on a bow (a self-adhesive bow mind you). Sometimes I move the bow around or even attach two if I am feeling crazy. And forget the cute tag; I often just write directly on the present.

2. Tree--Real or Artificial? I have an artificial tree. I grew up with live trees and love them... the smell, the drama of getting it set up and decorated. But when the kids were very small, David and I bit the bullet and purchased an artificial tree. I felt like a traitor at first but the feeling soon wore off. After all, it is great to just drag it out of the closet and assemble it each year without worrying about having to pay $50+ for a tree that will begin to shed after a few weeks and leave little pieces of tree all over the carpet. Having said that, though, this tree is about 14 years old now and the color coded branch system used to assemble it is shot and it has begun to shed pieces of fake pine needles all over my carpet. Maybe next year I'll get a real one.

3. When do you put your Christmas tree up? Usually the second weekend in December. I cringe when I see trees up immediately after Thanksgiving and cringe even more so when I see the few that go up after Halloween. Yuck!

4. When do you take the tree down? Historically, around February but never before New Years. One year the tree stayed up until April. Neither David or I wanted to deal with taking it down and it was in an "out-of-the-way" spot so we just ignored it. This year, I will take down the tree right after New Years. It's quite big and the living room isn't!

5. Like egg nog? Nope.

6. Do you have a nativity scene? No.

7. Favorite gift received as a child? I can't remember a favorite gift but I always thought getting our stockings was the most magical thing about Christmas. My sister and I would wake up very early, like 4am early, and go get our stockings. We would then go to one or our bedrooms and check out the loot! Then we would go back to sleep until the parents woke up.

8. Hardest person to buy for? It used to be my uncle Gary, but we don't exchange gifts anymore. He is the type of person who never needs anything. This year it's Dale. I don't really know him well enough but have some ideas. For me, the hardest thing about buying presents is actually giving up what I get for people because I tend to buy things I like.

9. Easiest person to buy for? Jessica.

10. Worst Christmas gift? It was a country-style sort of wooden contraption for the bathroom that held rolls of toilet paper. God it was awful.

11. Mail or email a Christmas Card? Mail.

12. Favorite Christmas movie? A Christmas Story. Never get tired of watching it... except on Christmas eve day when they show it for 24 hours straight.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Usually around mid-December. This year I am ahead of the game.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? No, but I once received a present from my aunt that I gave her several years prior. I bought her this really neat ceramic bowl (well, neat to me) and about 4 years later she gave it back to me for Christmas. I guess she forgot I was the one who gave it to her. I didn't care though because, like I said, I tend to buy gifts that I personally like.

15. Favorite food to eat on Christmas? Collard greens, squash casserole, deviled eggs. I generally don't eat those foods unless it's Thanksgiving or Christmas.

16. Clear or colored tree lights? Colored, with NO blinking.

17. Favorite Christmas Song? Don't know the name, but it's the one that they use with the Garmin commercials (Crap that's so bad). I also LOVE the Christmas album by the Kingston Trio.

18. Travel during Christmas or Stay home? Stay home. My employer (FSU) closes the week between Christmas and New Years so it would be an optimal time to travel if I had the money.

19. Can you name Santa's reindeers? Comet, Cupid, Donder, Blitzen, Rudolph...okay, I can't remember the stupid song.

20. Angel or Star on Tree top? Growing up, we always had a peace sign made out of tin foil on top of the tree. This year I have a dove or bird of peace-type ornament.

21. Open presents on Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning. Just like when I was young, Jason and Jessica are allowed to open one present on Christmas eve.... a present that I pick. When I was young, I always seemed to open underwear or PJs, but I have never done that to my kids! (sorry mom).

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? People. I am very antisocial. I can't stand crowds.

Eating my words

2007-12-05T20:38:00.000-05:00

Okay, despite all my ranting, I put up Christmas lights today.

I wanted to outline the house with lights so I went to Walmart and bought a 96-foot strand of multi-colored lights. It was a toss up between multi-colored or all blue, which is a look I absolutely LOVE. I also bought a multi-colored net of lights for my hedge which runs the length of my house save the front door stoop and garage.

So I was ready to decorate. I eagerly opened the box and pulled out a tangle of lights. Seriously, it was a tangle. And I didn't know how it was supposed to untangle.

I struggled with it for about 10 minutes, pulling and twisting the wire until I had somewhat of a net in front of me.

Awesome.

I threw it over the hedge in triumph. Only it was way too small. It only covered about 1/4 of the hedge, at best.

This netting costs $9 a box and I estimate I will need at least 4 boxes to cover my hedge. Well that's not gonna happen... that would mean spending $36 just to cover the hedge. Instead, I draped the net of lights on the very small hedge in front of my garage.

It looks good, but it is highly inadequate compared to the houses around me. I have more decorating to do in order to "get off the porch and run with the big dogs."

I still have the 96-foot strand to put up. I think I will drape my big hedge rather than trying to outline the house.

God help me, I guess I am one of them.

Merry Christmas

2007-12-03T22:24:00.000-05:00

There are at least 2 houses on my street that have Christmas lights up.

It's the beginning of December people.

And, in the Christmas spirit, a plethora of houses in my subdivision literally exploded into decoration (like popcorn) the day after Thanksgiving.

Merry Christmas.

Daily, I see cars with trees attached to their rooftops. The trees are prey shot in the hunt and brought back as trophy. I laugh to myself knowing that those trees will most likely be dead by Christmas. Needles everywhere.

How long does a cut tree last anyway? Don't answer that.

I absolutely HATE the commercialism of Christmas.

I hate it.

I hate it that people put up Christmas decorations the day after Thanksgiving.

I hate it that I have to hear commercials advertising the "After Thanksgiving Sale" 4 days prior.

I hate it that I will hear the "After Christmas" sales commercials on December 15th.

Not only do I hate... I refuse.

I refuse to get up at 4 am the day after Thanksgiving just so I can save 25%.
(Okay, I did this once. It was a mad house I tell you).

I refuse to be pressured to put my tree up any sooner than the second weekend in December.

I refuse to be told what decorations I can display on the outer regions of my house. I hear some subdivisions REQUIRE that you decorate with only white lights.

Merry Christmas.

Headliners

2007-12-03T21:33:00.000-05:00

I've been collecting stupid or odd headlines for a while now. I'm sure I've missed a ton but I saw this one just now and had to post it:

Divorce is bad for the environment, researchers say

Whaa?????

Here are some more (older ones) I've collected:

Hugh Grant avoids charges over 'baked beans attack'
Paula Abdul trips over dog, breaks nose
Boom Separates From Base With Two People Inside
Neighborhood May Be Infested With Meat-Eating Lizards
O.C. Police Say Man Tried to Pay Store Tab With Pot
Lawn-loving man gets life for murder
Calif. town asking grandmothers to help fight gangs

I don't know. I think that the first one is my fav.

Out of the Mist

2007-12-03T20:01:00.000-05:00

Driving up Bannerman on my way to work this morning I could see clear skies ahead. The view from my rear view mirror, however, was not good. It was ominous.... dark and dreary; and it was encroaching my rear quickly.

Very quickly.

It wasn't even dark when I turned from my subdivision onto Bannerman. But now, only 2 miles up the road, there was an eerie presence behind me.

I glanced back and forth from rear view to front view. It was so eerie. It reminded me of The Mist. I had just seen it yesterday. Supposed to be the "scariest" movie of the year. Well, it wasn't. It was kind of suspenseful but totally predictable.... and full of gore.

The Mist is about a mist that comes out of the mountains and overtakes a small town in Somewhere, USA. It is full of monsters spider-like creatures that devour the unsuspecting and stupid townfolk.

Anyway, I turned right onto Thomasville Road fully expecting the darkness that was behind me to now be on my right. But it wasn't. It was behind me still.

That is weird, I thought to myself. I looked to my right and it was basically clear.

I continued down Thomasville and the darkness followed but never overtook me.

After about 7 miles, the wind picked up and there was a flurry of leaves swirling all around the car. Violently swirling. Just like the monster bugs from The Mist.

And there was just a sprinkle of rain.

As I approached I-10, the wind died down. The leaves were gone. The darkness was gone.

Then it poured down rain.

The way we were

2007-12-01T09:42:00.000-05:00

OMG, you have to read this blog:

http://15minutelunch.blogspot.com/2007/10/strap-in-shut-up-and-hold-on-were-going.html.

I found out about it from my cousin Sarah's blog and she found out about it from her brother's blog. This is one of the funniest things I have ever read and so true..... I remember the 70s.

The dance

2007-11-29T12:46:00.000-05:00

Dale and I went dancing the other night and we have video of it. I haven't danced in years but I think I held up pretty well.

Check it out.

Ima Weener!

2007-11-24T18:04:00.001-05:00

I entered some mosaic pieces in the fair this year.... and WON!!

First place on the table and second on the wall hanging.

Feels good.

Mom entered a macrame piece also and won first place.

Questioning that that should not be

2007-11-22T21:06:00.000-05:00

Every parent has asked some pretty weird questions of their children. I wish I had written down some of the doosies I have asked in the past; but better late than never.

Questions I asked today:

Why is there a lolly pop attached to the closet door?

I didn't get an answer, yet it is still there.

Why is there a Lazy Susan in the middle of my bedroom floor?

Jessica answers from her bedroom, "Sorry, I was sitting on it." Then, from the living room I hear Jason say, "Who is Susan?"

How

2007-11-21T17:46:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm talented but not this talented!

Your Native American Name Is...

Nina Tis-See-Woo-Na-Tis

Your name means: Strong Woman Who Bathes With Her Knees

What's Your Native American Name?

Bathroom blues

2007-11-21T16:59:00.000-05:00

Jessica got locked in the bathroom today.

I was in my bathroom at the time. Apparently she spit on Jason and Jason chased her into the bathroom and he pushed on the door or something... and it jammed.

Who knows what really happened. They both deny any wrong doing. All I know was that the door wouldn't open but the knob would turn. It was stuck just like my closet door.

It wasn't funny at first, but after a few minutes, I was cracking up as I listened to her going through stages.

First was awareness. Something was wrong with the door. I could hear her all the way in my bathroom... tugging, turning, rattling, banging.

Next was panic. She realized the door was not going to open; she couldn't get out. She began screaming that the door wouldn't open. I came as quickly as I could but couldn't get the door to open.

At this point she was freaking out. I got her calmed as best as I could and ran to call the management company.

Then came anger. As I was on the phone, I could hear her ranting and raving like a sailor... and I was in the kitchen. That picture of her on Halloween came to mind.

Next was acceptance. There was nothing to do but wait until the repairman arrived, so I began to shove magazines under the door. Anything that would fit. Her friend Rob called and, as I was telling him that she was stuck in the bathroom, she told me to put the phone up to the door. Amazingly she could hear him through the door so I leaned the phone on the floor so she could talk, laughing as I went for the camera. This was too funny.

Finally came relief. After about 30 minutes, the repairman arrived and freed her. She ran out of the bathroom and gave me a huge hug.

Like the other knobs, the insides were plastic and broken. The repairman replaced it with a metal one. I told the management company that they should let the owner know that all of the door knobs should be replaced (after all this has happened four times now) and the woman said she would put in a work order.

A taste of wine

2007-11-16T08:22:00.000-05:00

Went to my first wine tasting last night.

I rarely drink wine.... and when I do, I get tipsy after a few sips. The last time I had any was a year ago at a workshop in Charleston, SC. The swanky hotel I stayed in had a wine and cheese reception every afternoon from 4:30 until 6:00 (after training had concluded for the day mind you) so I had a glass the second day I was there and found myself giggling uncontrollably while trying to compose an email to a coworker. The third day I had two glasses and proceeded to wander the streets of historic Charleston in search of food.

Anyway, Dale wanted to go and it seemed like something sophisticated grown-ups did, so I was game.

It was held at ABC Liquors near the FSU campus. We arrived around 6:30 p.m., paid the $5.00/per person entrance fee, and collected our wine glass (I thought it was neat that we got to keep our glass.).

We could barely get in the door. The store is not big at all and it was filled with college students! I should have known that offering tastes of different wines (and beer) for a meager $5.00 would attract them.

There were three stations serving various types of wine. I couldn't really see what was being offered though because of the crowds. Eventually, we pushed our way to a station in the back. The woman serving began to explain the different types of wines she had for the tasting. I know absolutely nothing about wine except that it comes in red and white, so I listened intently as she described what she had to offer... Pinot Noir, Chardonnay, Chablis. When she finished, she looked at me patiently waiting for my decision. I had no clue what she had just said.... it was like listening to a foreign language, so I told her I wanted something red. I am sure she thought I was the cultured one!

She poured a small amount of "something red" in my glass and I walked off down one of the many aisles filled with bottles. It was very dry but not bad. Dale joined me and we stood there away from the crowds. After I was finished, I decided to try a white wine. So I pushed my way back to the woman and told her I wanted to try something white. She proceeded to speak in her foreign language, describing the two white wines she had. Again, I had no clue what they were so I just pointed to the one on the left. It was much better.

After a few more minutes, we maneuvered around to another station that was serving different imported beers and Dale tried a few. After that we left. It was just too crowded and I was feeling kind of sick from the wine. We went to the Hobbit for wings and beer... more my style.

It was a neat experience and I am glad I went, but I don't know if I'll go to any more.

Mule Day

2007-11-13T12:03:00.000-05:00

Dale, Jessica, and I went to Mule Day up in Calvary, GA, a few weekends ago. I hadn't been since I was a child, so I was excited to experience it with an adult perspective.

Dale, and others, told me that we needed to get there early... like 6:00 a.m. early.... in order to snag a good parking spot. So I set the alarm for 4:30 a.m. so we would have time to wake up and make the 30 minute drive up there. When the alarm went off, however, it was quickly reset for 6:00 a.m. It's just not right to get up that early on a Saturday!

We arrived around 8:00 a.m. and it was already pretty crowded. We paid $5.00 to park in the middle of a pecan orchard, but it was relatively close. We made our way down a narrow road toward a huge field filled with tents in the foreground and campers behind.

Mule Day was huge. It was totally different from my childhood recollection. All I remembered, actually, was seeing harnessed mules attached to a pole of some sort following a circle path beat into the dirt. They were grinding sugar cane into molasses.

I was hoping Jessica would get to see that as well, but there wasn't any sugar cane making going on; at least as far as I could tell. Instead, there were lots of food and craft booths and a stage where different groups of cloggers danced to what seemed to be the same song... something country.

People were selling everything from quilts, to Christmas ornaments, to hats, to beautiful fused glass (my personal favorite). Someone was actually selling a "bottle tree" which consisted of a pole with dowels extending off (like a tree) with plastic bottles stuck on the ends. Who would pay money for that? Dale wondered how bottle trees were grown so I told him they started out as baby bottles. [Okay, I know that was pretty bad].

We walked around until our feet hurt, stopping to buy sugared pecans, fudge, back scratchers, and miscellaneous other items. We decided we had better leave before the parade began at 11:00 a.m.; otherwise we would be stuck until it was over because the parade route went between the field and the exit road.

We were too slow, however, and had to wait until it was over. Luckily we didn't have too long of a wait. As I was watching the myriad of horseback riders and mules pulling wagons make their way up the parade route, I laughed as a teenage girl rode past me while talking on her cell phone. It seemed strange to have cell phone usage and horseback riding together in one parade. What could be so important that her phone call couldn't wait until after the parade?

At least 60,000 people attend Mule Day each year. About 20,000 were leaving with us after the parade, just as the other 40,000 were arriving. It was a mad dash to get back to the car and get out ahead of the others.

The main drag through Calvary is a two-lane road, so you can imagine the traffic jam. Both lanes of traffic were backed up as far as you could see and even further... and both were at a complete stand still (well our lane was moving more than the lane into Calvary). Surprisingly, it only took us about 15 minutes to get out of the chaos. I felt sorry for the semi driver obviously passing through and unaware of Mule Day. He looked very unhappy as we passed him. And we saw people parking as far as two miles away.

Now I know why they say get there early.

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T19:48:00.000-04:00

Jessica wanted to be a prom queen for Halloween so naturally I waited until the last minute to think about finding her a costume. We went to the dreaded Wal-Mart yesterday and looked through the already picked over costumes. There was nothing prom queen-related in her size so we settled on a vampire dress, fangs, and long black wig. The fangs came with makeup.

I spent about $30 on the costume, but she was excited so it was all good.

It was crowded in Wal-Mart and there were only three human cashiers, as usual, so against my better judgment I decided to use the self-checkout. What a disaster.

I had to call the cashier over twice to help me. First the fangs wouldn't scan, which sent the computer into lock-down mode and the cashier had to punch in a 14-digit code to clear it. Then I had to get approval from the cashier to purchase beer. Finally, on the way to the car, I glanced at the receipt and noticed I had charged myself twice for the wig, so back we went to get the extra charge refunded.

Of course by this morning Jessica did NOT want to wear the costume because it was too short. And by this afternoon, she didn't want to wear the wig because it made her head itch.

So off she went with her friends to trick or treat with just her fangs and face makeup. But at least I was able to snap this pic while she had the wig on. She looks very much like she does when she is in a bad mood. Ha ha!!

Honor Roll!!

2007-10-31T19:40:00.000-04:00

Kudos to Jessica for making A/B honor roll! Way to go Jessie!!!

If she looks like she's sleepy it's because she was!! I took this early this morning.

Just another Saturday

2007-10-20T12:57:00.000-04:00

I have been living in this subdivision for almost 11 months now, traveling the main road in and out numerous times daily. There are a couple places where the road has dips. They are not big dips but big enough to cause a bump when driven over.

This morning, I noticed construction saw horses with a caution lights had been placed near the dips and signs posted to watch for the dips. I am wondering why they are cautioning people at this point? Surely whomever authorized the signs already knew about these dips. Maybe they are going to be repaired soon.

••••••••••••••••••••••

On my way to the bank this morning, I was stopped at the intersection of Thomasville and Bannerman Roads in the left hand turn lane. A motorcycle cop with lights flashing pulled out in front of me and the other stopped cars and stopped midway across Bannerman to block us. Then another motorcycle cop pulled into the middle of the intersection and began motioning the already moving traffic to move through the intersection, while he held up his hand in a stop motion towards me and the other cars.

I figured someone important must be coming into town, hence the police escort. As I sat there wondering, I watched the traffic going past me for a bus or a limo or something to indicate the reason why these cops had stopped us. Several semis passed, a tour bus passed, and many cars came through intersection, but nothing special. In the meantime, my red light turned green and then red again as I sat there wondering what was going on.

After a few more minutes. The cop in the middle of the intersection got on his motorcycle and left; the other cop followed.

I wonder if they were pulling a joke or something.

••••••••••••••••••••••

On my way back from the bank, I noticed a woman walking down the main drag of my subdivision while reading a book. Not a paperback book either... a rather large hardbound book. I am curious as to how she can read and walk without getting hit by a car.

Spread the mustard

2007-10-17T12:00:00.001-04:00

Your English Skills:

Grammar: 100%
Punctuation: 80%
Spelling: 60%
Vocabulary: 20%

Does Your English Cut the Mustard?

My English just spreads the mustard.

Laurie

2007-10-15T06:38:00.000-04:00

Laurie is back in the hospital.

Daddy called me Saturday night to tell me. All we know is that she is in CCU and is in stable condition. Mom said she thought it was the same problem she initially had last February (the first time she went in)... can't remember what that condition was called.

As before, the hospital will not give us details without a "pass code" and we don't know how to get that yet. I think Laurie is the one who has to authorize it but at this point, we don't know her mental state.

Her boyfriend's sister said that Laurie had started drinking again; that she barely weighs 100 lbs.

When I talked to Laurie last month, she told me was 112 lbs. It was an awkward conversation for me. She seemed out of it, slow to respond, almost like she was drunk. But Daddy said that she talks like that now because of having meningitis... it damaged her brain.

I feel numb. I feel bad that I am not more worried, but I just can't think about it.

One small step for mankind... one giant step for me

2007-10-11T18:22:00.000-04:00

I now have a dryer. Yipee!!

I called up Mays-Munroe and asked if they had any dryers in my price range and the man (the owner actually) said the cheapest one he had was $299. It was an off-brand made by Whirlpool; a commercial grade dryer. He proceeded to give me way more information than I would ever have wanted to know which I liked. He knows his stuff. They have been in business since 1932.

I asked how soon it could be delivered and he said they could deliver it today.

Well that was good enough for me.

So I bought one right then and there over the phone. Bought it sight unseen.

After the delivery guy called to tell me they were on their way, I realized that I didn't even ask what color it was. I was hoping it was white, to match the washer, and it was.

I never thought I would be excited to do laundry..... and it will be nice to have a backyard that is not booby-trapped with clothesline.

Get the phone

2007-10-11T18:01:00.000-04:00

Yesterday at work I heard a phone ringing. It was the phone in the copier area.

It rang and rang and rang and rang and rang.... no one answered.

I continued working trying to ignore the incessant ringing in my ears. I began to think, "Doesn't this person realize after 30 rings that either no one is around to answer it or is going to answer it?"

Finally, after at least 50 rings, it stopped.

Relief. I went back to concentrating on my work.

Three minutes later the phone began to ring again. "Geez," I thought to myself, "Doesn't this person ever give up? NO ONE is going to answer the phone!!!!!!"

I looked over as Colin was walking out of his office and we both looked at each other as if in mutual understanding. He thought it may be a fax call. But it wasn't a fax because we now get our faxes through our copier. We have no fax machine.

I decided that I was going to answer it. I walked back to the copier area and saw two people in the area ignoring the phone.

I just walked off. Somehow I felt stupid for wanting to answer it.

I NEED a dryer!

2007-10-07T19:19:00.000-04:00

I went to look for a dryer today.

Okay, I know I have procrastinated. I know.

First I went to Home Depot. They had one, a brand made by Maytag but not called so, for $279.00. Their delivery fee was $55.00. The sales lady said there were none in stock but I could have one delivered by Wednesday.

I decided to move on and look at Lowes.

Lowes' cheapest dryer was $259.00, but was an off-brand... a Rover. The door didn't shut very easily so I was wary. They had an Amana brand dryer for $279.00 and the door shut better. They charged $59.00 for delivery and could have it delivered tomorrow.

I have cold feet, however. I pondered and pondered. But I feel like I need to check out Mays-Munroe, a family-owned business that has been around since I can remember. And they were not open today.

In the meantime, I am continuing life without a dryer. I got my clothes out on the line today even though there wasn't much sun and it was humid.

Later, as I was sitting on the couch, I heard rain... it came out of nowhere!

"DAMN," I yelled. I jumped up and started running around like a mad woman.

"Jason, QUICK!, help me get the clothes..." I ran to the car to get my umbrella. I couldn't find it. I opened every door on the Jeep and looked all over the garage before I found it.... in the Jeep.

This has happened too many times now. WHY!!

We got the clothes in, but they were damp. And Jason was complaining the entire time because apparently he will melt if he gets wet.

As soon as we brought the clothes in, it stopped raining.

I NEED a dryer!!

Just a weekend

2007-09-30T18:56:00.001-04:00

David had the kids this weekend. He took Jason and Jessica up to Columbus, GA, Saturday for a soccer play date. I traded vehicles with him Friday night so they could travel in the Jeep.

David's truck is on its last leg. Actually it should have died a painful death years ago but for some unknown reason it is still running.

David has never wanted me to drive the truck because it could break down at any time, but he agreed because he had no choice. He couldn't take a chance of driving it to Columbus. Besides, I assured him, I wouldn't need to use it much so there wouldn't be any problems.

I drove it to Dale's Friday night. I was kind of worried that I would make it. The truck's engine sputtered every time I stopped at a light and it had absolutely no pickup. It was all I could do to get it to go 60 mph. I didn't dare pull out in front of anyone, not even if they were aways away. And the lack of side mirrors made it that much more hard to drive.

On my way home Saturday afternoon, I got a flat tire coming off I-10. I was sitting at a light when the man next to me told me my tire was flat. It went flat fast because I stopped at that light with a full tire, and when it turned green and I stopped at the next light it was flat. So I pulled off into the first gas station I could find and called AAA. Thank GOD for AAA; it's so worth the $57 membership!

I called David to tell him what had happened. After he calmed down enough to listen, I asked him where the spare tire was. It's in your garage, he said. WHAT?

Well what do you want me to do? Have AAA tow the truck to my house and have them put the tire on? Or, tow me to a tire store (which I had no clue where one was nearby)? He couldn't answer me.... all he could say was do what I thought best.

After about 45 minutes, the AAA tech showed up. He put enough air in the tire so I could follow him around the corner to a Discount Tire store.

I then proceeded to spend the next 2 hours waiting for a new tire to be put on.

My whole Saturday wasn't ruined, however, because Dale came over and cooked me Etouffe with crawfish and shrimp. It was fantastic. It was such a treat to have him cook dinner for me... and he can really cook! Later we watched the FSU football game... yes I actually watched football.

Today, he mowed my lawn for me. This man is so sweet.

Cell-out

2007-09-26T21:35:00.000-04:00

I did it.

I have become one of the millions.

One of the millions who have a "cell" phone.

Okay, I have had a cell phone for several years... a prepaid one. I bought it when I went to New York City the first time. It made sense to make calls on it rather than pay the outrageous hotel fees, plus I would have something for emergencies.

I have been using this phone for 4 years now. At first, I never used it. But as time went by, it was convenient to have.

Really convenient.

I would be in Publix and need to ask a question about something and I would be able to just call home and ask... No second-guessing.

Over time, my need to use it increased. I had it on in the car after work so the kids could call. I had it on when I went anywhere away from the kids.

I found myself adding $10 every week. I finally had to ask myself... "What is the point in having a prepaid cell phone that costs almost as much as a 'real' cell phone?"

In addition, the kids had been harping on me to get their own cell phone. And they were relentless in their pursuit.

You don't need one, I would say over and over, like a broken record. My logic was unheard however. According to them, it wasn't fair. All of their friends had a cell phone. It's true, unfortunately, but that doesn't mean I will cave and get them one.....

Until yesterday.

I went to Sprint. David has his cell with Sprint and is very happy. I went down there with the intention of getting myself a phone... myself only.

But after about 15 minutes, I ended up getting the kids a phone.... I broke down and got the FAMILY plan.

God help me, I caved..... but the kids are so happy. And I am happy too, I have to admit.

The phones are all alike, except for the color. Mine is blue, Jessie's is pink, and Jason's is black.

I can see the value of them having a phone now. God, I am SO brainwashed I know. But I can see it.

Birthday girl

2007-09-25T19:37:00.000-04:00

Jessie turned 13 yesterday. She's finally a TEEN!! Well technically she's been a teen since she turned 10 but now the sound of teen is in her age.

We celebrated this past Saturday. She had two friends come over for a sleepover. They played music and made up dance routines all day. It really brought back memories of when Laurie and I used to make up dance routines and cheers.

Her bootie included...

Two Webkins animals (a dog and an elephant)... Webkins is apparently the new Beanie Baby. For a mere $14.00 you get a stuffed Beanie Baby-like creature but the difference is that you adopt the creature and can go to the Webkins website and play games, etc., online.

It was funny because I knew she wanted a Webkin very badly, so I went to Blue Abaco to buy her one. They did the gift wrapping very nicely in a white bag with pink and white tissue paper. But the bag had their name and logo on it and I knew if she saw the "Blue Abaco" logo she would immediately know what was in the bag. She was the one who told me that Webkins were sold there.

So, being the crafty person that I am, I taped an index card with her name written on it over the Blue Abaco logo. She would never know now!!

Then her friend Morgan arrived with the EXACT same bag!!! And the sticker was showing!! God, I thought to myself, she's gonna know for sure now. I mean the bag was identical... same tissue paper and all. However, Jessie must have been too excited to notice, because she never picked up on it. While she was opening Morgan's bag, I was praying that it wasn't the same Webkin!!

She also received...

Some clothes from Grandma Jill that look fabulous on her. One such item is a black skirt that swishes and sways when she walks. It's scary to see my daughter with hips, I tell you.

Gift cards to Claire's and Justice for Girls from dad.

A CD of Hannah Montana, the latest in tween music. Actually she's very good. She is the daughter of Billy Ray Cyrus, if you remember him.... Achy Breaky Heart.

A Nintendo DS and game called Nintendo Dogs. Actually she is buying the Nintendo DS with money from her grandparents, but I went ahead and bought it for her in advance so she would have something to play the game on.

She had a very good birthday I think. Here are some pics.

Trying

2007-09-23T22:49:00.000-04:00

There is only so much in life that I can take.

I am trying to get divorced.

I am trying to deal with two teenage children who are challenging.... SO challenging.

I am trying to date a man who means so much to me.

I am trying to get dad to spend more time with the kids.

I am trying to work full time.

I am trying to get the kids counseling.

I am trying to be a better parent.

I am trying... I am trying.

But yet, I feel like I am failing.

Leaning to drive

2007-09-21T19:31:00.000-04:00

Today, on my way to work, as I was sitting at a traffic light staring vaguely ahead and singing to my CD, I noticed a car coming from the opposite direction making a u-turn. The car was white. An older model car, big like a Cadillac, and it was leaning very much towards the passenger's side.

It was so lopsided that I thought the car would surely flip over. But it didn't. It looked like someone had jacked up the driver's side so that it towered above the passenger side.

And after the driver completed the u-turn, the car stayed that way. I thought it must have had a whole lot of weight on the passenger side to keep it down like that.

It really looked odd.

The light turned green and as I passed the car, I looked over and noticed that there was a VERY large woman holding a baby in the passenger seat.

Arrr, it's Talk Like A Pirate Day.... again!!

2007-09-19T15:22:00.000-04:00

Thanks to my cousin's blog for a reminder that today is Talk Like A Pirate Day. I love this day. Here is my pirate name. I think it suits me. What do you think?

My pirate name is:

Mad Anne Flint

Every pirate is a little bit crazy. You, though, are more than just a little bit. Like the rock flint, you're hard and sharp. But, also like flint, you're easily chipped, and sparky. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

Bite the bullet

2007-09-16T13:50:00.000-04:00

I have got to get a dryer. My dryer died a few months ago and I have avoided making a decision about whether to have it repaired (new motor) or to buy a new one or to buy a used one. So in the interim, I have been using a clothesline in the back yard.

I don't really mind hanging out the clothes actually, except for the times I did and went somewhere and it rained (that has happened twice) or the fact that I cannot just do laundry whenever I want... I have to wait for sun! The problem is that don't have enough line to hang everything any more and there is no where else to put line.

My back yard looks like a danger zone as it is already and I am sure the neighbors are less than thrilled. There is clothesline strung over every available inch of usable space, zig zagging in every direction. I have to be careful not to decapitate myself when I am mowing.

Today, as I was hanging out my second load, I ran out of line. I began to think about what was different. Why did I run out of room? I still had two loads left to wash.

Then I noticed that the majority of the clothes belonged to Jessica... way more clothes than she would wear a week, so I decided to count them. She had 16 shirts and 10 pants/shorts/skirts for one week! When is she wearing all these clothes?

If I had a dryer, I wouldn't have to deal with lack of space to hang clothes, or rain, or embarrassing my children because my underwear is viewable out the back door.

It's time to just bite the bullet and get a dryer.

Birthday continued

2007-09-15T22:01:00.000-04:00

We celebrated Jason's birthday formally today. David, mom, and aunt Jeannie came over. I told them to come between noon and 1:00 pm, so naturally they showed up at 11:00 am. Mom made a chocolate cake (organic) and brought the candles.

Jason got lots of nice presents: a tennis racket and balls; a soccer ball pump kit, a mini soccer ball for juggling, clothes, a lava lamp, and the biggie present, a 19" LCD flat panel TV. He was floored by the TV.

Jason told me afterwards it was one of the best birthdays he's had in a long time. Tonight we went to the FSU Women's soccer game. They won against Auburn 3-0. He met his friends Sam and Ben there and they came home with us to spend the night.

They are all in his room now playing soccer.

Birthday boy

2007-09-14T18:45:00.001-04:00

The boy turned 15 today. I can hardly believe he is that old. We will celebrate tomorrow with cake and presents, but tonight he opened one present from me.... a mouse for his laptop.

He loves the one I bought myself a few weeks ago and I thought I bought the exact same one, but turns out I didn't. So I gave him my mouse and took his new one. Now I have to get used to it or take it back. It's not as nice and is thinner and harder to fit in my hand. I may be taking it back, actually.

On another note, an obviously out-of-tune note, this was the reaction I got when I sang happy birthday to him.

Spot's revenge, part 2

2007-09-07T12:35:00.001-04:00

I knew it as soon as I opened the door to the garage this morning. Spot whizzed past my leg and into the kitchen at 90 miles per hour headed straight for the food dish.

Crap, I thought out loud, Spot was trapped in the garage all night. I immediately smelled confirmation.

He pooped.

I quickly checked the roof of my Jeep, pleased to find nothing. I looked around some more and eventually located his "revenge" behind the washer.

Waiting in Jacksonville

2007-09-04T20:39:00.000-04:00

This past weekend we went to a soccer tournament in Jacksonville. Jason's team won for their age bracket (U15) and that was great... but it was a LONG weekend. Rain forced the Saturday afternoon games to be cancelled and rescheduled, which, in turn, caused the games scheduled for Sunday to be pushed back and so on and so on. As a result, we spent much of the weekend either waiting for the rain to stop or waiting for the game ahead of us to finish because it started late. It was very frustrating to say the least but there were some funny moments.

Waiting around for a game to begin.

When there is lightening, a siren sounds, games are immediately stopped, and everyone is supposed to retreat to their cars for 20 or 30 minutes. Three short sirens indicate when it is safe to resume play.

On Sunday, while waiting for the girls team playing before us to complete their game, which started late, the sky got very dark and we heard thunder in the distance. We knew what was coming and were bummed because of the rain delays that had occurred already and we hadn't even gotten to play yet. Sure enough, right at the end of the girls' game, the siren went off. We went to our cars and the boys kind of stood around in front talking. It wasn't raining, nor was there any more thunder, but we had to wait for the three sirens.

About 20 minutes into the wait a car alarm began going off. At the same time, the referees took the field and the boys followed. I overheard someone say that it was the three sirens and I said, "Isn't that a car alarm?" No one replied, so we piled onto the stands happy that we could finally watch some soccer.

About 30 seconds into the game, the siren went off. Everyone in the stands began booing and awwwing. Then another siren went off... then another. We quickly realized that it was the three "okay to come back" sirens and busted out laughing because the refs and boys had mistaken the car alarm as the siren. Note, they sound nothing alike!

One day I'll be someone's main squeeze

2007-08-30T12:10:00.001-04:00

You're a Boa Constrictor!

You're that person who is always offering massages to people and you spend a lot of time training yourself to get better at giving them. Sometimes, however, you make people just a little nervous with how close you're getting to their neck. But you can usually knead them right back into a false sense of security, er, I mean into feeling comfortable. Your mouth seems to be capable of opening wider than anyone else's. You've sometimes wondered what it would be like to be made out of feathers.

Take the Animal Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Personally, I think this one is way off. I prefer to GET massages rather than give!!

smites, and nubes, and imps, oh my

2007-08-28T21:02:00.000-04:00

I am sitting on the couch surfing the internet and Jason is sitting on the other end of the couch playing Runescape while talking on the phone to his friend Justin, who is also playing.

Runescape is an interactive online game where you are a character and can interact with other characters (people) in real time. I don't really understand the concept, but apparently you go to different "worlds" and fight people, or go on quests, or work for money. It is very popular with his friends and I am constantly having to remind him to get off of it and notice that there is a real world outside.

There is a lot of terminololgy associated with this game and to over hear him talking about what he's doing or going to do is like listening to him talk in a foreign language.

So I am sitting here surfing and cracking up at what I am hearing:

"Dude, there's an imp at the bank."

"I'm about to go get dragon boots."

"I'm gonna take my CV brace off because I am going PK'ing."

"Dude, I just got poned."

"Go into smites and nubes and get their DVS's."

"He's owking and he has obbey kabe."

I just asked him what "owking" meant and he replied that it was for "formage."

I will not bother to ask him what "formage" means.

Small world

2007-08-26T18:23:00.000-04:00

Today I went to Target to get Jason's school supplies.

On my way to the checkout line, I ran into a former neighbor of mine from the neighborhood I lived in before separating. I actually went to high school with her, although we were not close back then; nor were we close when I lived there, but we would speak now and then.

We stopped to talk to each other... me telling her about the separation and my move with the kids; she introducing me to her husband and offering her sympathies to a broken marriage.

Talk got around to the sale of the home. She asked if I minded telling her how much it sold for, so I did. I didn't mind because everyone who owns homes in that neighborhood is curious to know what sells for what. That way when the time comes for them to sell, they will know how price their homes.

I told her about all the heartache we went through trying to get a real offer on the place and that the woman who bought it was very excited about it.

Just as I was telling them that the buyer had put in all new appliances, I heard someone say my name. I turned around and saw a woman with a shopping cart.

I looked at her trying to recognize who it was but before I had a chance to really see her, she said, "I don't know if you remember me, but I am the woman who bought your home."

I had only met her once, and that was at closing.

I started laughing and said that I was just telling them (my old neighbor and her husband) about you.

What a small world.

Soccer Saturday

2007-08-25T21:14:00.001-04:00

Just in from a very long day in Pensacola. Jason had a play date of two games.

The first game was at noon. It was incredibly hot and sunny with not much of a breeze. Hotter than it has been here in Tallahassee the past few weeks.

I told Kim, our team manager, that it was pretty bad when you went to wipe the sweat off your upper lip with your finger and it stayed sweaty because your finger was sweaty!

I got a big kick out of Kim today. She went to set up her chair umbrella, which has seen better days, and this is what she discovered:

All the umbrella's protective caps were missing, revealing very dangerous looking spiky tines or whatever they are called. Plus the umbrella would open out all the way.

Being the smart ass I am, I had to milk it, I pulled out my camera and made fun of her for a full 10 minutes prior to the game kick off.

Later on during half time, a very young girl, probably three years old, came up to her and asked if she was her grandmother. Kim misunderstood at first and replied that she was not her grandmother and the little girl said, "No, are you her grandmother?" (pointing to Kim's daughter.)

I thought Kim was gonna cry (not really). She was smiling of course and pretending to be offended to me, but I was cracking up. She is younger than me. So I milked that for a long time! She's such a good sport. We laughed about that for a long time.

During the second half of the game it began to rain. The rain cooled things off, which was great, but rain forces us to either retreat to our cars or huddle in our chairs under our umbrellas. So it was raining pretty steady, not a down pour but hard enough, and there we were huddled under our umbrellas... we are hard core soccer moms after all. It was a sight though...there Kim sat huddling under her spiky umbrella that wouldn't open all the way, clutching her team notebook close against her so it wouldn't get wet. It was a pitiful sight indeed.

Of course I was totally cracking up, making fun of her, and I would have taken her picture except Jessica had taken my purse (containing my camera) with her when she retreated to the car.

This is one of the pics I took today. It was so bright that I couldn't tell what I was taking or if they were in focus, but they were for the most part. My camera was on full magnify but still it is not close. That's Jason in the middle in white/red.

We won the first game 2 to 0. We lost the second game 3 to 0. The second game seemed to be much more physical and harder for the boys.

By the time we left Pensacola, I was so tired. It had been a long HOT day and I dreaded the three hour drive home, but we made it... getting home at exactly 8:49 p.m. We had a contest where we predicted the exact minute we would pull into the garage. Jason said 8:48, I said 8:49, Jessie said 8:50. It was 8:48 as I pulled into the driveway, and Jason was doing high fives on himself, but as I entered the garage the clock changed to 8:49. Of course I milked it!

During the drive home, Jessica showed me one of her many talents:

Man I'm hungry

2007-08-25T21:05:00.001-04:00

How to make a Liane Michel

Ingredients:

1 part pride

5 parts brilliance

5 parts instinct

Method:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Top it off with a sprinkle of sadness and enjoy!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

More alarming talk

2007-08-24T08:27:00.000-04:00

I generally get up at 6:15 a.m. on work days. My alarm clock is set for 6:00, but I hit the snooze button twice before actually getting up.

This morning, while in the middle of my first snooze hit and trying to savor the last 10 or minutes of sleep I had remaining, Jessica walked into my bedroom and announced that it was time get up.

Trying to shield the light as if I was a vampire, I groggily asked if her alarm had gone off and she said yes. I told her I needed one more snooze and then I would get up.

By the time I stumbled out of my bedroom at 6:15, she was already dressed.

I think buying her an alarm clock may turn out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made. Now I just have to get Jason to use his.

Silent alarm

2007-08-23T10:16:00.001-04:00

Throughout the night I would wake up wondering if Jason's alarm clock had gone off and if he was up early. I didn't know what time he had set it for, but figured he'd set it for 5:00 or 5:30 a.m.

When I got up at 6:15, he was still asleep and the alarm clock was silent. I proceeded with my routine of turning on his light and telling him it was time to get up. At 6:30 he was still in bed. At 6:45 he was still in bed, but got up when I told him that this was the third and final time I would tell him.

As I was getting ready for my shower, he came in my room and sat down on the bed. I told him that I wanted him to put the clock back in the box because I was going to return it.

"Why?", he asked.

"Because it doesn't work", I said.

I had bought both the kids the cheapest ones Target had (less than $5.00 each) and Jessica's had not gone off either.

"Yes it does", he replied.

"Well, then why didn't it go off this morning?"

"It did", he said with a grin, "but I wanted to sleep some more, so I turned it off."

I just laughed at him and went into the bathroom.

I am not an alarm clock

2007-08-22T20:01:00.000-04:00

This morning Jason complained to me that "I" need to wake him up earlier..... that he doesn't have enough time to "wake up" before he has to get ready for school.

I looked at him in disbelief.

Every morning at 6:15 (when I get up), I walk into his room, turn on his light, and tell him it's time to get up. He promptly grunts and turns over.

At 6:30, I go back to his room and prod him until he gets up. I practically have to drag him out of the bed and he is taller than me now.

So I am sitting on the couch this morning, looking at him in disbelief, and trying to realize how, somehow, it is my fault that he won't get up earlier?

He said he wanted to get up at 5:00 or 5:30 a.m.

I told him I would buy him an alarm clock and he could get up at a time he felt appropriate. So I did this afternoon.

We'll see what happens in the morning.

On another note....

The other day I asked Jessica to get the towels off the clothes line, fold them, and put them away. When she put them into the linen closet, she just crammed them in however they would fit.... and not on the same shelf either.

Towels were crammed everywhere.

I noticed, of course, and being the compulsive person I am (need to have order), I told her she should not have done that; that she should have put them in nice and orderly. Otherwise what's the point of FOLDING them?

Just now, she opened the linen closet to get a towel and she asked me why the towels were crammed in there.

I feel like I just can't win.

I toad you so

2007-08-20T21:44:00.000-04:00

You Were a Toad

You drift into altered states of consciousness freely and easily.
You also have the power to change luck and life a long life.

What Animal Were You In a Past Life?

Hell yes.

And we're off......

2007-08-20T19:29:00.000-04:00

Today was the first day of school. Jason is starting high school (god); Jessie middle.

I made them pose for me this morning. Haven't done that in a while. When they were little I would always take a pic of them the morning of the first day. Jessie stopped arguing with me long enough to pose.

It was funny, she just went into "photo" mode...like a model... and I snapped the pic. Then she was right back into her argument, never missing a beat.

I just finished doing MY homework... filling out the mound of paperwork they each came home with.

Soccer returns

2007-08-18T18:27:00.000-04:00

Soccer season is back and I love it!! Jason missed almost the entire season last year due to a broken leg/foot, so it is so nice to be back! The next two or so months will be jam-packed with play dates and tournaments. Then his travel team will take a break while high school soccer has its season. And he plans to try out. Travel soccer will then resume in January.

Today, Jason's team played the U-16 boys. Here are some shots of him. He is #38 (red shirt) for those who don't know. Man, it was so hot outside.